How to find a good team

JoJos_mama

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My daughter is going into 14U, we have not been very successful with teams so far. We think it's a good fit but by 3rd tournament are very unhappy with coaching. We obviously are missing something so how do we determine if it's a well coached team at offer time? Do not want to keep moving her and want her on a solid team long term.
 

lewam3

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what position does she play. Is she good. Does she practice on her own...a lot. Is winning her/your primary goal? How far will you travel.
What do you see/experience by the third tournament that has you dismayed?
Your original question is a loaded one, but one that parents of players ask themselves more often than not, just need a little more clarification
 

JoJos_mama

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She plays 3rd, short and pitches. She is currently stranded out in right field where she has never played but has done good. We are completely ok with whatever position she plays and she works nightly at home, hitting, popups, fielding and pitching. As her parents our goal is for her to get better and to achieve her goals, her goal is to eventually play on a college team. We are willing to travel as far as we need to. The coaching is sub par, no communication, lots of favoritism, spoke to coach about some hitting issues we were having must of upset her because now daughter is benched. Not confrontational at all and 100% believe not to interfere with coaching. But if something isnt working let's try something different.
 

JoJos_mama

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I would like to clarify that in no way do we think our daughter is the best girl on the field. We just do not feel that she is being put in positions that set her up for success. She is at every practice and works hard on her off time. Girls that never show up for practice, miss tournaments and strike out more time than not are being played ahead of her because parents are friends with coaches. That is what we are trying to get away from. My daughter absolutely has to earn her spot anywhere on that field and she knows that. We make it a point to watch other teams and how they are coached at every tournament we are at. She is not going to make an elite team but there has to be a team out there that works with the girls and has all the girls best interest at heart. A team that builds them up instead of crushing them and a team that rewards hard work and heart not just plays favorites to the coaches friends. Does a team even exist?
 

jpkeating

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How is the team doing overall, are they winning or are they getting there butts handed to them?
I would say if there consistently winning the coach is playing his best 9 or 10. If there always getting beat then I think you have a point.
 

lewam3

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Thanks for clarifying her and your positions. Travel ball can be very unrewarding if you are not on the right side of the HC. How does one get on the right side of the HC?
1. Be the best pitcher
2. Be the best hitter
3. Be the Head Coach's daughter's best friend.
4. Be the daughter of the assistant coach.
5. Be the daughter of the HC
6. Be the best catcher, etc.

What SHOULD it be?
1. Be the pitcher who doesn't walk players, hits her spots.
2. Be the hitter who rarely strikes out, has QAB, draws walks, puts the ball in play.
3. Be the fielder who gets filthy, diving for balls, covering bases, hitting the cut-off, communicates
4. Be the best bunter!!!
5. Be the player who Picks up her teammates.

So a HC that values the second set of skills is the team you must find, BUT... your DD must be the player doing those things on the second list. It is a two way street and fortunately she is still a youngster. Looks at milestones to see if she is college material, too. Be realistic. should be pitching mid 50's at U14.
She should be hitting the ball hard at U14. Good luck.
 

CARDS

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She plays 3rd, short and pitches. She is currently stranded out in right field where she has never played but has done good. We are completely ok with whatever position she plays and she works nightly at home, hitting, popups, fielding and pitching. As her parents our goal is for her to get better and to achieve her goals, her goal is to eventually play on a college team. We are willing to travel as far as we need to. The coaching is sub par, no communication, lots of favoritism, spoke to coach about some hitting issues we were having must of upset her because now daughter is benched. Not confrontational at all and 100% believe not to interfere with coaching. But if something isnt working let's try something different.
At tryouts did she tryout for a position or was she/you just offered a spot with no specifics on where she would be playing?
At 14 she should be starting to hone in on a position. If she is a decent pitcher she should not have issues finding a team since everyone is looking for pitching.
While it is no guarantee of coach competence ask if they are part of a coaching network and if they have any coaching credentials. If coaching experience is less than 5 years most still have a way to go with player and team development, game management.
At tryouts ask to see practice plans, how many players are they looking for, how many do they roster, during fall/winter activities you should get a good understanding on how the team is coached so when spring/summer play starts you know where she stands with the team. Attitude is also a big part of success.
 

JoJos_mama

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Thanks for clarifying her and your positions. Travel ball can be very unrewarding if you are not on the right side of the HC. How does one get on the right side of the HC?
1. Be the best pitcher
2. Be the best hitter
3. Be the Head Coach's daughter's best friend.
4. Be the daughter of the assistant coach.
5. Be the daughter of the HC
6. Be the best catcher, etc.

What SHOULD it be?
1. Be the pitcher who doesn't walk players, hits her spots.
2. Be the hitter who rarely strikes out, has QAB, draws walks, puts the ball in play.
3. Be the fielder who gets filthy, diving for balls, covering bases, hitting the cut-off, communicates
4. Be the best bunter!!!
5. Be the player who Picks up her teammates.

So a HC that values the second set of skills is the team you must find, BUT... your DD must be the player doing those things on the second list. It is a two way street and fortunately she is still a youngster. Looks at milestones to see if she is college material, too. Be realistic. should be pitching mid 50's at U14.
She should be hitting the ball hard at U14. Good luck.
Thanks for the response. She is currently about 52 in her pitching, struggling with hitting for some reason right now but she is working hard to get it corrected. I understand we are a bit away from playing college ball but that is what she wants to do, so I would really like to get her on a team that is going to help her develope into that player.
 

wannaplaysb

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The “right” team doesn’t exist. Unless you create it. Intentionally.

Instead look at how do I make my kid her best. We are at the end of our journey. My about to be a senior daughter will pitch for a D1 College. She loves her college coach and can’t wait to get to her school. Tonight she lost to a great team that flo softball will rank as one of the top teams in the country 6-3. But she gave up two earned runs and looked at the big picture like
“ we will see those girls in OKC”

I only tell you that because she plays with her best friends. We quit worrying about the girls and comparing them before 14u. We were not prepared last year for the stress of girls developing and boyfriends and who is committed where. Oh yeah... and temporary driving and driving...but we have a hundred pictures from high school ball!

As parents. We chose to look at our team as a whole. We made each tourney a memory and focused on the view along the way. We focused on our own kid and allowed them to be responsible for their job. Only their job. And to be their best at it. This made my daughter her best.

We cheered for each one of them!

Tomorrow she with two of her teammates will sit with amazing players to get their all state honors. The right team is there. If that is the culture you help create. And the goals...those are personal. If her goal is college. That is the conversation you have with her every pitch. Every ground ball. Every swing. It’s hers to own.
 

Packrat

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The “right” team doesn’t exist. Unless you create it. Intentionally.

Instead look at how do I make my kid her best. We are at the end of our journey. My about to be a senior daughter will pitch for a D1 College. She loves her college coach and can’t wait to get to her school. Tonight she lost to a great team that flo softball will rank as one of the top teams in the country 6-3. But she gave up two earned runs and looked at the big picture like
“ we will see those girls in OKC”

I only tell you that because she plays with her best friends. We quit worrying about the girls and comparing them before 14u. We were not prepared last year for the stress of girls developing and boyfriends and who is committed where. Oh yeah... and temporary driving and driving...but we have a hundred pictures from high school ball!

As parents. We chose to look at our team as a whole. We made each tourney a memory and focused on the view along the way. We focused on our own kid and allowed them to be responsible for their job. Only their job. And to be their best at it. This made my daughter her best.

We cheered for each one of them!

Tomorrow she with two of her teammates will sit with amazing players to get their all state honors. The right team is there. If that is the culture you help create. And the goals...those are personal. If her goal is college. That is the conversation you have with her every pitch. Every ground ball. Every swing. It’s hers to own.
Agree 100% enjoy it now because when the hormones and boyfriends and recruiting all happens at once you’ll look back and think it wasn’t so bad after all. Just keep it positive and it will all work out. And also just have her enjoy the game it goes by quickly
 

kc0602

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The “right” team doesn’t exist. Unless you create it. Intentionally.

Instead look at how do I make my kid her best. We are at the end of our journey. My about to be a senior daughter will pitch for a D1 College. She loves her college coach and can’t wait to get to her school. Tonight she lost to a great team that flo softball will rank as one of the top teams in the country 6-3. But she gave up two earned runs and looked at the big picture like
“ we will see those girls in OKC”

I only tell you that because she plays with her best friends. We quit worrying about the girls and comparing them before 14u. We were not prepared last year for the stress of girls developing and boyfriends and who is committed where. Oh yeah... and temporary driving and driving...but we have a hundred pictures from high school ball!

As parents. We chose to look at our team as a whole. We made each tourney a memory and focused on the view along the way. We focused on our own kid and allowed them to be responsible for their job. Only their job. And to be their best at it. This made my daughter her best.

We cheered for each one of them!

Tomorrow she with two of her teammates will sit with amazing players to get their all state honors. The right team is there. If that is the culture you help create. And the goals...those are personal. If her goal is college. That is the conversation you have with her every pitch. Every ground ball. Every swing. It’s hers to own.

Thank you for this. I just happen to come acrossed it while looking for what will be available for 16U team for our daughter next year and your words here are so encouraging and what we as parents are trying to accomplish with our daughter who is finishing up her 3rd year of travel.
 
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