I apologize for reposting this as I have cut and pasted this from another site I belong to. My daughter was the "underclass volleyball player of they year" for her HS as a freshman. She could do most phases of the game well and really matched up well for our HS when playing a consistent state caliber team in various tournaments. She sat bench on varsity and never got into a game but we had a senior laden team so that was that. The next year, and after all of the summer training etc., she was doing really well. The week the games were to start, she was supposed to have worked her way into the varsity starting lineup per a conversation with the varsity coach. BB went to practice the following Monday (first game on Tuesday) but the trainer noticed she had a bad strawberry on her butt/hip and told her to get it wrapped. She did in athletic PE and so, never missed a minute of practice. The HC walked in, saw the gauze and wrap and asked her what she did. She told the truth and said she played in a softball exposure tournament and had to slide a lot. She also said she was fine and didn't need the gaze but the trainer told her to put it on. The HC went ballistic and told her that she was done with softball players. My daughter never got into one match at either the JV or Varsity level. She sat bench in every varsity game. She practiced with the varsity and never once missed a minute of practice. After a couple of weeks, when JV players started playing over her, it was apparent that she was never going to get into a game. I was furious and she wanted to quit. I told her no. She could learn a lot about not being the star of the team. The AD and everyone else went out of their way to avoid me. Me and my wife never missed a match and were there for her each time she cried after another disappointing game on the bench. We went to the banquet and made our daughter thank the coach for the opportunity to be on the team. The following fall, I gained my daughter as a member of the golf team and she did exceptional.
In no way could I list all of the positive things she learned but I know that she would come home proud of herself and how hard she worked regardless of what this coach thought. I know she gained a new understanding of dedication and work ethic. I know that she learned the differences in types of coaches and so knew the type of coach she would never be. I know she gained a new kind of respect from her peers who all knew what was going on. This coach had a terrible season and was fired the following year. You all raise your dd the way you want but beware of the "other lessons you are teaching."
