Is it just me???

Discussion in 'General Softball Discussions' started by daboss, May 10, 2019.

  1. daboss

    daboss Well-Known Member

    This has been burning inside me for years and maybe I'm overreacting but I want to share my feelings and see what you think.


    Being such an active coach over the years and still very much involved all winter with my pitching lessons I get asked a lot if I'd like to buy something. I normally participate--------some times at great expense. The problem I have is; who's supposed to be doing this? Is it the parents or the kids?

    Recently, I was asked to buy sandwiches to raise money for a camp 2 sisters wanted to attend. Contact was made by the mom by way of a text. I agreed. Sunday while I was working, I get a text by the mom wanting to know if they could come out and collect the money prior tho placing the order. We agreed to a time. I came to the house early to clean up some (I'm a farmer) and put on a clean shirt to wait on their arrival. On time comes a truck with the dad alone to collect the money. I invited him in and offered him iced tea I took the time to brew. We talked. I asked about the girls, where are they? He informed me they were home doing nothing. I honestly felt like they didn't know their dad was coming but at the least they didn't want to come collect the money themselves. So, am I overreacting to believe this is wrong?

    With my daughter, I was guilty of offering fundraiser deals to my friends as I saw them. I took orders. However, She was always involved in collecting the money and giving them their purchase so she could thank them. That was mandatory and at a great sacrifice and expense to me. One year I bought her entire quota of submarine sandwiches because with the farm and the season we were experiencing I had no time to drive her everywhere to do this stuff. I was a single parent. That may have been the least out-of-pocket season she ever had if you consider all the gas and time it took me to do it the right way!

    I've always tried to keep my distance and not get involved telling others how to raise their kids. It's what is great about our country, freedom to choose. Not every event in life needs to be a teaching moment. Some times it simply "is what it is." I can't help thinking it's a mistake to participate in fundraisers like this when the kids don't appear to care. Maybe they don't need that camp that bad. I can make my own sandwiches. It's not THAT great a bargain.

    So is it just me?
  2. mroby5172

    mroby5172 Active Member

    100% agree, my kids have to be involved...
    snuffleupagus likes this.
  3. TheGame

    TheGame New Member

    I agree that it should be the responsibility of the kids. Unfortunately, half the kids out there have parents who do it all for them.

    Fundraising in general is one of my pet peeves. There are some very good fundraising opportunities out there but there are way too many that are a waste of time. I like when there are options out there for those who wish to offset their fees by participating in fundraising but when its not mandatory. We have no family in the area and all of our friends are from the sports world and up to their necks with their own fundraisers. Too often you are just passing money back and forth and making very little process. Worse yet, its as you said, daboss, usually just the parents making the deals.

    We did a fundraising event a couple years ago where the girls volunteered to pass out drinks and snack during a marathon and earned $600 for the team. We need more of these kind of opportunities. It was the girls doing the work and giving their time. No sales, no stress of deadlines - just one morning of work. Was a great team building opportunity and paid for a tournament.

    I've always thought teams should going to neighborhoods to rake leaves in the fall or shovel snow in the winter. Would raise some funds, create a solid work ethic and be a team building exercise, too. Would surely teach players the value of team fees better than their parents hitting up co-workers to buy crap they don't want.
  4. jpkeating

    jpkeating Member

    Fundraising is bull shit plan and simple. Don’t expect other people to pay for your kids extracurricular activities.
  5. Gray55

    Gray55 Member

    Fundraising......I have mixed feelings cause I have been apart of some good ones and some just plain stupid ones. However my daughter has always done the work! As a parent I already pay a set team fee and feel that the fee should pay for what is needed and scheduled. If the team what's to earn money for "extra" things then its on the coaches and players.

    Example of good fundraiser is trash cleanup and the girls are paid for their services. Eldora Speedway makes this available to local teams and groups. Our softball team did this and it was profitable and a team bonding moment in one.

    Bad Fundraisers....raffle tickets! Parents usually end up buying the tickets and team has to buy the prizes. Seems like a waste of time to me and not many places allow you to sell them outside of their stores.
    Dave Coffee and TheGame like this.
  6. swohio

    swohio Member

    I agree for the most part. Winter of 2017-18 daughters team would finish a fundraiser, and immediately start another. It is very uncomfortable, asking the same people over and over to contribute. This winter, her team did NCAA Tournament squares only. Its a lot easier to let someone know they can win money back, instead of trying to sell a $30 candle, or 300lbs of laundry detergent.
    TheGame likes this.
  7. Chardon Storm

    Chardon Storm Member

    You're not going to get much done, at least at a public school, without fundraisers. Myrtle Beach, equipment, uniforms, field improvements, indoor scrimmages, umpires, etc. for the most part are all paid for by money raised by the players and families. Plain and simple, you either do it, regardless of comfort level, or your program has the bare minimum.
    City Slicker likes this.
  8. swohio

    swohio Member

    Not such a big deal with school ball for us. The money raised there was very transparent, and spent very well. I was more talking about travel ball fees/expenses. This year zero complaints. Last year, it seemed like we sold $10,000 worth of crap to get $1000 back for the team.
  9. City Slicker

    City Slicker Active Member

    Agree with you. High schools - especially Public Hs's - rely on fundraising. I do disagree that team out of state trips should be part of fundraising. Fundraising should be for the necessities.

    For youth sports, just about no chance that I am paying to have someone else's kid play. Nobody comes knocking on my door with a check for my kids to play.....
  10. swohio

    swohio Member

    Have to disagree on the out of town part. That was the best thing to happen to our team. They went out of town pretty much strangers, and came back teammates.
    Chardon Storm likes this.
  11. City Slicker

    City Slicker Active Member

    Agree that it is huge for a team. But, it's not a necessity. I'd love to be able to take our team away for a week, but we have to buy balls. We go bowling instead. lol
  12. snuffleupagus

    snuffleupagus New Member

    I won’t say bad parenting but definitely a missed opportunity to show kids how to conduct business. A huge skill set that my daughters will be shown. If a donation is asked on their behalf they will be present to show appreciation for said donation. Same if it is a sales situation where goods or services are traded for money

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