Coaches of "older" girls:

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Member

• Jun 8, 2009

• #1

Right before the start of a game, daughter suffers severe cramping due to the monthly visit from "Aunt Flo" 'Sensitive issue for her - obvious pain - doesn't want to tell coach the specifics of her affliction, and doesn't want to be vague and get scratched from the line-up and be labelled a Wuss.

Luckily, Advil and adrenalin got daughter through the game...

Male Coaches - how would you like your players to handle this situation?

(And stay On Topic. This can easily end up in a number of places)

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #2

Easy answer.......s##k it up and play.......might get smacked around but it will usually make them mad enough that they will play.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #3

Been there and done that several times.

Some of my girls, past and present, have no qualms to come up to me and tell me point blank that it was "that time of the month" and they were not feeling well, etc. and could they get some Motrin from the mother. Not all girls are that brazen. I address the issue this way - I tell the girls if there are any issues that you feel uncomfortable discussing with the coach, you can always talk to to a "team mom", "female coach - if any" or have your parents belay the information to me in a subtle manner.

When they are told that I raised 4 girls to adulthood - that seems to relax them somewhat. Nothing the girls do really surprises me anymore.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #4

Good answer johnnies, I think the coaches forget about this subject sometimes. I forget with my own DD and I'm a girl.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #5

FPitchDad: I'm glad my daughter doesn't play for you.

Follow up question : Coaches, do your players know of your "policy" on this issue?

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #6

Just tell me your sick. I don't need to know nor do I want to know the specifics. I have enough team mom's to handle the details of this specific situation.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #7

It is not really a policy, just a courtesy.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #8

I have coached older girls in a few sports, since I have no idea what girls go through and really dont want to know, if there was anything girly they didnt want to tell me they could tell my wife who was normally my assistant. When my wife told me a girl wasnt feeling well I knew what that meant and that was good enough for me.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #9

I dont coach older girls but coach girls that are on the bubble for that time of thier life to start. I held a team meeting at a local arcade and had the girls out playing games. I told the parents to make sure they had the female side of things covered. Have whats needed on hand because Murphy's law will happen. The dad's at the meeting just couldnt take the talk, the moms were like we never even thought about it why are you bringing it up.............well because I was the one on hand when my daughter stood at short stop in Toledo 10 years ago and came off the field with 2 outs and one away from the championship because her monthly visit from aunt flo started.............

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #10

Just keep the Cramp Meds In the First aid Kit.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #11

Not saying fpitchdad's response it right or wrong for teenage girls, but I do know that is the response my DD's college coach would have given. The potential would be that every weekend she would have 1-2 players with the same issue.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #12

It is very simple. Be kind and subtle to these young ladies' issue. For those who are just starting, they are somewaht confused themselves. I ask that they tell their parent and the parent gives me the information I need. Don't make a big deal out of it and if the other players wonder why "Susie" isn't playing just simply state she is ill and they will get the picture. Just be respectful.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #13

This is Liniluna's daughter. I am 14 and I play softball. If I show up with cramps then I didn't come there to whine and complain about how miserable I feel. I come to tournaments and games to play not sit my butt on the bench. So yeah. **** it up. It's just cramps.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #14

My first experience with this came in our 1st year at 14U when one of our girls playing left field yells from left field at me to tell her mother to find her a t@#p%n....the whole park heard it......I was dumbstruck to say the least but figured we needed to appoint a team mom as well with specific duties!

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #15

Being the female half of our coaching staff, I knew the "schedule" of most of my players. As they get older and more comfortable with the situation, they are more open about it. Please, please keep in mind that cramps are different for each girl! If you asked the girls to rate the pain level of their cramps from 1 to 10, you will get answers ranging from 1 to 10! For some, cramps are more of a nuisance. These girls will generally $uck it up and play with little being said. But there are an unlucky few girls who have VERY painful cramps. Consider this - when do our girls ever ask to not play? To say these girls are competative is an understatement!!!! They lie about being hurt, play through injuries and sickness. So if one of my players ever came to me to ask for time on the bench until the Advil kicked in, then she can have the time she needs.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #16

Right on 15heat! We've had a player before whose cramps were so bad before the 'visitor' that she would vomit & once her 'visitor' arrived she was 100% better.

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #17

alright, I'm going to stick with the 10u's forever....they still think I'm pretty cool and this issue hasn't been a topic "that I know of"...

 

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• Jun 8, 2009

• #18

Worst thread ever

 

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• Jun 9, 2009

• #19

only the "worst thread ever" if you want to avoid reality! I talked to a female pitching coach about this very topic one day and here was her advise to me-if you have a player who is acting in a way you have never seen before ask her point blank..."are you about to or have you started your period"... She played travel and 4 years of College ball...be honest be real and deal with it...these young ladies will have to all of their lives. From a 43 year old man with 3 daughters (a wife) and 13 players I love like my own, learn to help them deal!

 

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• Jun 9, 2009

• #20

Yes Jjen, I want to avoid reality. I know some of my players would be mortified and probably scarred for life if I ask them that. Plus, the only thing I would be qualified to do in that situation is make it worse. Some things are best left to professionals (i.e. mothers). You must know your limitations. If you need to change a belt on a lawn mower, I can help. If you need to launch a boat in a lake, I can help there too. If you want to discuss the emotional tribulations of monthly female issues, you need to look through the chain link at the females sitting in their fold-up chairs under the EZ-UP. They are probably all on the same cycle anyway.