Year off?

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DH and I have decided that dd is just not travel material at this point. (I mostly believe that it is a maturity issue with her-she has the ability-we all saw it all winter-but she is just not applying anything she learned. We want to take a year off (as the financial and time consuming end of traveling has been hard on us this year) since she is not happy as she sits a lot . We plan to continue lessons throughout the next year with the same org and if opportunity allows tryout for that team again the following season.

Has anyone out there taken a year off (she is a 2nd year 12U going up to 14U)? Is this a good idea or a bad idea? I was pretty certain of what I wanted to do but now I am second guessing myself. :-? :-/ :-? :-[

 

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I think it is up to DD....ask her, and let her know what ever she decide you will support....you may and probably are totally right...she isn't travel materal @ this time...maybe never...it may be better for her to play @ a level where she gets to play, nobody gets better on the bench...is she a multy sport athlete ? Maybe softball isn't her passion...Good luck.
ps that jump from 12u to 14u can be brutal....that is when kids that have a passion for softball truly engage and ones that don't drop out.... Kids are suddenly bigger, faster, and stronger,no to mention you start playing HS kids that are facing 18y/o during the school season and the improved skills carry over....

 

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If softball is her passion and the sport she wants to play in HS I would not take a year off. ?I may switch her to a team where she gets more play time, but I wouldn't take a year off. ?She is not going to get any better or gain any game sense not playing the game and as LUVFPSB said, the transition to 14u can be brutal. ?If after next year nothing has changed, I would then probably decide that softball is not her sport. ?If things have changed, then I would have her try out for that team again. ?With improvement she would have a good chance of making and getting play time for that team. ?You can guarantee that she will mature, but there are no guarantees that she'll love the sport.

 

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I would have her try out for some other teams. Maybe a different coach could get more out of her.

 

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I would have her try out for some other teams. ?Maybe a different coach could get more out of her.

I agree, taking a whole season off she can miss allot.
My DD struggled her first year. It was 2nd year 12U and half way through the season she began to struggle. Her body changed as did her batting stance. It really through us all for a loop. She went from top batting average to the very bottom. It was very sad to watch. (And that was just her bat, not to mention her desire.)
But, she didnt want to give up.
So, During the off season my DH worked hard with her. To re-develope her talent with this new body she had to work with. She did great her 1st year 14U to our surprise. If we had skipped it? Im not so sure she would be the athlete she is today. (Not perfect but talented.)
All athletes, even at the pro level probably struggle. If softball is her sport & she loves it. It could pay off to push her a bit.
But like someone else said, If it isnt her only sport. Maybe shes more talented in something else where your money can be better spent. But ultimately, it is up to her to decide. All we can do as parents is support their goals & dreams in life. Physically, mentally & financially (unfortanately!!) [smiley=lolk.gif]
Best of luck!

 

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I dont think taking a year off would make her more ready to play travel ball. The jump from 12 to 14U is IMO the biggest jump, I am sure others would disagree. I like the idea of maybe finding her another team, maybe one that travels less for mom and Dad. This is assuming she loves playing, and just doesnt like sitting. Being good in the gym and not in the game is generally a lack of game expierence or nerves issue that can be overcome by playing, so taking a year off would be counter-productive IMO.


Good Luck!

 

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If she has been playing travel ball for a while, she may be good enough to play high school ball which could be a great pride & accomplishment (and social) benefit for her. Maybe there is a better & more suitable travel ball opportunity for her out there? If she lacks passion for the game that is one thing, but at this point in her development (right before HS), could be a tough "timing" year to "stand pat" if she wants to wear the local colors with her friends?

Not all of my kids were/are good (or even commited) athletes, but I always encouraged them to stick with their sports for all of the life learning & social benefits. Sometimes, you just gotta "soldier on" ... personal decision though, of course. Just some thoughts

 

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there are plenty of school-ball girls that don't play travel so it's not the end of the world, however, if she wants to get from the bench to the field, there will have to be a way to maintain her skills, or otherwise, those girls that have played travel will leapfrog them (this also depends on the area/school...if its a a big school, say Worthington, Pick, or a Dublin, there is obviously going to be a fierce competition....out in the booneys--and not every booney area--the choice of athletes is slimmer, so it might be easier to make the squad)

my DD struggled first year 12's...the second year she switched to a lefty and changed fielding positions, so it was still a learning experience...now at 14's, thank god we had 2 years of 12's! 14's are too tough to simply walk in and expect to play well...the girls are wicked good

 

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The jump to 14u can be a big surprise for players that never skip a year, let alone trying to come back for your second year of 14u. As mentioned above, the girls are much bigger, stronger, faster and the pitching doesn't get any easier to hit.

Lessons and practice only go so far if you are not applying what you're learning on a regular basis. If your DD is not having fun and enjoying it the decision is simple in my mind. It becomes much more difficult if she loves the game and just can't compete at her current level. I don't envy the decision you have to make, good luck to you and your DD.

 

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Do what other proud papas do, start your own team! ;D

 

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I think the part of the equation that I read was ( financial and time consuming), if you don't have the money and you don't want to put in the time, it is simply "Take sometime away from travel ball". But if your daughter has the passion and wants to get better in the off season, play rec. or a different (cheaper organization)

Does she still want to play at the travel level? Is it her time we are considering or yours? The financial end of it well that is definitely yours. Good luck with your decision, it will be a tough one for both of you.

 

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Thanks for all the input. Changing teams just would not help things. It is a really a mental thing with her. She wants to play. She does not want to play rec because she said she will never get better. We had a long talk with some of the coaches from her organization. We are going to give it another go. Well, one step at a time. On our ride home from the tournament last night we discussed things very intensely with her. My DH told her it was her decision, this year and that next year we make the decision. If she wants to work hard and earn back her position we will support her completely. So we will start with tryouts (for the same team as we do love them. They are pretty fair she just lost her drive and position due to her actions.) When she first messed up early this spring she got inside her own head. Complained for days about how bad she S&@ked. And it was a downhill pitfall from there. Then she took a shot to the face that required stitches, so there is a little bit of fear going on (now recently she took a foul ball off her side-again more flinching and fear). She wants to get back in there and catch but she doesn't know how to overcome this fear of injury. We discussed changing positions, she said that is not an option. She wants to stay behind the plate. There are so many factors in this equation, I am not sure if it is solvable. So we will take one factor at a time and work through it, then move on to the next one. Maybe if we break it down we can fix things well before next spring. She has game performance anxiety, somewhat caused by her screwing up once and now worrying she will do it again and get pulled. She has a slight fear of getting hurt. Plus a confidence issue caused by her sitting and feeling as though she failed and is embarrassed in front of her team mates because she is getting less playing time. What a mess! One step at a time and we will see how it goes.

The financial side is not a problem if she is enjoying herself. Zero issue with spending the money if she is happy. I just feel that if she doesn't want to put the effort in all the time (which I don't think she is choosing not to do it just isn't happening) that it is a lot of money for unhappiness that I could be using to finish remodeling the house which get put on hold especially when spring/summer rolls around. Time well that is just that I miss a lot of my other children's activities for her, again not a problem if she is enjoying herself). I just feel like I missed my son's games for her to be miserable while he was succeeding and upset that I didn't see his game. If she enjoys herself I will find a way for the time and finances to fall into to place.

 

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Here is the one promise I made both of my daughters when it came to sports. The minute they find they are no longer enjoying the game I will not force them to play. When you force a child to play because we are, as parents, hoping for some type of financial assistance for college, have big dreams of our own, or just reliving our own childhood through our children, you are only hurting the child. Don't take all of the control away from your daughter with what she can and cannot do.

Sit down with your daughter and let her lead the discussion and really listen to what she is saying. If this is an issue of your daughter would like to play but needs more time to learn specific skills, you need to truly evaluate the situation for what it is. In the travel ball arena a year off could hurt without the proper direction and support to maintain the skill sets and increase the level of knowledge by hands on play. Therefore you need to put the facts on the table so your child can understand the potential effects of not playing for a year. You then need to look at playing within an organization/team that best meets your childs needs.

If you learn that your daughter truly does not have the level of desire to play travel ball, let her decide the course of action. I cannot tell you how many times I have seen, and still see kids playing that are doing it because they are being forced to play by their parents. The only control they have is on the field. I see kids that will hold back or become extremely reserved as a way of controling a situation. I have seen players just not try because they really did not want to be there. I saw my own daughter play half 888 because she didn't feel she had any control. Once I gave her some control on the situation, she returned to a strong player. But much to my disappointment she is no longer playing and still has one more year of 18u left, however, she is happy and still loves the game, on her terms. I only ask that some day my kids give back in some why to their community because someone had to do it so they could participate.

Just food for thought . . .