With the original poster now in the position of trying to balance things for next summer, if the schedule wasn't laid out with specificity in the fall, then I think I would lean toward a more demanding schedule and let everyone know now, and then see how much push back you get. Maybe travel for a showcase about every other weekend and try to stay local every other weekend, something like that. One key is to hit only showcases when you do travel. No point in wasting a weekend of travel expenses on a non-showcase.
But like everyone else above said, the key to the balance is everyone being on the same page, which requires specific communication up front. I mean really, really specific. Just saying we are going to do Stingrays, Lasers, ASA qualifiers, etc., isn't enough. You have to allow for curve balls that will be thrown at you during the year. I did the whole thing long enough to guarantee that something will arise each year to potentially alter the best-laid plans.
If I were starting a team in the fall (or continuing one) and it were a showcase 16-U or 18-U team, I would not only state the tournaments we plan to play, but also the nature of the team and the general expectations. I would give them the tournaments we plan to play (assuming we are accepted to each), the alternate plans if we're not accepted to various tournaments, and then the caveat that opportunities might arise that are unforseen and we will probably take advantage of them. So, the message would be that this is a showcase team and we are definitely going to do some things and might do these extra things if we are permitted, so don't join the team if you're not up for it. And our plans could change at any time based on opportunities that arise and we will likely take advantage of those opportunities, based upon a decision of the coaching staff on whether the opportunities are worth pursuing. Please understand before accepting a roster spot that there will be no vote or even any input solicited on these decisions.
All of that might leave me without a team in Ohio or western PA, but if I do have a team, we're on the same page.