OK, first time he talks to a pitcher (if they are new with his team), he tells them to remember the two rules. Then he tells them what the two rules are. Remember, the plan is to get them to laugh and relax.
Number 1:
"I'm fat and"
Number 2:
"You're Ugly"
It makes them laugh. After that, when they are stressed, all he has to say is, "Remember the two rules."