Don't burn the committed ones

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Why is it every yr I see a coach bring in a new girl or 2 and try them in a spot where a girl is doin great with very few if any errors, yet you very seldom see the coaches dd moved even with multiple errors , bad attitude' etc.
This usually happens well into the season, Ive seen this on 3 teams now.
Im talking about doing this in tourneys and not practice, is this a common practice with all coaches or is it just the week teams doing this.
This can leave a very bad taste in your mouth and I have seen it cost the team games on more than just one occasion. Ive seen this happen with pitchers 2nd base etc. It has happenned to my dd as well as others over the last 3 seasons but like I said I have never seen it happen to a coaches daughter.
I've coached some great rec teams over the yrs. and in our 4th season of travel ball. I would never do this without discussing with dedicated parents and especially to a great kid that is getting the job done as well as making all games practices etc. Is this just part of the daddy ball Ive seen or should I expectice from here on out.​

 

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Wow Slider you are brave to put this as your first post! I recommend you put on your seatbelt as the responses come in as there always seems to be two separate "dugouts" on this issue: the parents who have seen/experienced what you describe and the coaches who do what you describe.

 

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Daddy ball ****s, my dd been exposed to it, even the identified scapegoat. Can make them tougher, it's not a easy or fair world out there. In the end you have to let your dd choose where she wants to play. I feel your pain!

 

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Karma is right, brave is what you are. It does happen, seen it a few times usually as the season gets later seen it blow some teams up. They have a right to make their team stronger, but it's usually at the expense of a veteran team member. A girl that was good enough the previous year but did not progress as fast as the coach thought she would. So he sees another player that might fit and gives her a shot during a tournament late in the year kinda like a tryout before tryouts start. I hope your dd has the confidence to deal with the competition. It can be handled correctly or it can be handles BADLY as Brian Adams says "it cuts like a knife" Good luck

 

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I think we have handled it properly, my dd did finish in her favorite spot and then some, but now that the season is over we are moving on.
and by the way my dd only had 4 errors on the season and most were in the double digits,also finished in the top 3 batting ave. as well as obp.
They ran off a good one with this,hope the grass is greener on the other side.

 

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It depends on the team and the coach...although alot of the weaker teams are rampant with daddyball/mommyball which is why they usually stay a weaker team. There are some coaches who are in it to ensure their dd's play when and where they want regardless of their abilities and some coaches who are in it for the team and the knowledege they can share with all the girls to make them better players. That's the tricky part for parents, weeding out the junk from the good stuff. Do your homework and ask around, people are usually more than happy to tell you about how great or cr@ppy their coaches are....when it comes to coaching abilities, there aren't too many parents who sugar-coat.

 

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Had it happen to younger dd, coach dumped 5 starters and not even bother to call them that they weren't wanted back.
Fortunately we sensed something wrong and did tryouts and are very happy where we landed. Great team and org.

 

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Just another couple of thoughts, and I'm not taking sides on this: But, 1.) Just because Player A doesn't make many errors doesn't mean that she gets the job done at her given position. Playing "error free" and getting players out aren't the same thing.

And 2.) What the player accomplishes offensively can sometimes give her a starting spot over someone with similar defensive abilities.

2 cents worth.

 

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Agree with Louuuu on this ... it also depends primarily on what's best for the team ... getting the combination of the 9-10 players out there who give the team the best chance to win ... may mean sub-optimizing at one or more positions ...

 

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Slider sounds like the org we were cut from 4yrs ago, it had daddy ball, mommy ball,uncle ball, brother in law and cousin ball all involved. It was a blessing to get away. Then we met JP. GO SCARLET

 

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If you choose to be on a daddy ball team, then I recommend at try-outs to ask the other parents or even the coach what postion his DD plays. If it's the same one as your DD, just walk away. Not worth the headache and fight that you will never win.

Just generlizing-not saying that all daddy coaches are this way. but it is a VERY high percentage.

 

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I don't know if it's a very high percentage or not of parent coaches who operate under "daddy ball", but it definitely is a "watch out" ... agree that it's something you want to inquire about before joining a team with a parent coach. If you've really had a lot of bad luck with it, there are more and more teams out there with non-parent coaches that you ought to look into. Being one of those myself, we still get complaints about "favoritism" but in my opinion, the primary issue is not to do with the coaches having favorites, it's usually more about the parents not being able to fairly assess their DD's ability ...

 

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Actually, my dd has never lost her position to coaches dd since we started travel ball but Ive seen girls brought in and tried in her position and failed when the weakest spot was where coaches dd was playin at and also seen it happen to others on the team that were playin great with offence and defence as well as being more committed than the ones that were just the opposite. I guess the big question is why do it in a tourney especially after seeing how bad it was in pool play. Seen it happen with two girls this year, one was already committed to a team that we had played 2 times and 1 local girl that decided to only play rec earlier in the yr and had waited to decide this right before season started. I do make it a point to make sure my dd does not play on team if coaches dd plays there because as you have said it is a losing battle. Like many other girls my dd is a utility but still has her favorite spot where she is at her best but it is a shame that I have seen games lost because of this when there was a girl on the team that would have obviously gotten the job done when we needed it most.
I guess all I am saying is if it's not broke don't fix it.

 

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I couldn't tell from the origianl post if it involved three teams that your daughter was on or just three teams that you had seen. If it was three teams your daughter was on then you need to do a better job of selecting teams. If it was other teams then it seems to me that the parents of the players involved should be the ones with the post rather than you.

 

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My DD has seen this on the past two teams she has been on as well. There is a blessing in some of this taking place. The exposure your daughter gets to different types of coaches by choosing to make the move to another team allows them to expand their capabilities by being trained from several different perspectives. I may be digging around for the silver lining, but I have seen my DD's skill improve in each move that she has made. It can be frustrating as we all want to find a "home" for our DD where they can play all the way up to their big college debutes, but after speaking with several D1/D2 players who also changed teams for similar reasons, it seems that it may be for the best to get them prepared it they take the journey into high school and college ball.

 

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In response to rdsherman5, I'm not so sure that you can fault a person for their choice in team selection. Coaches, players and parents all put their best foot forward at the time of tryouts. How can a parent or player possibly forsee what a coach may do 6 months down the road? Many say talk to returning parents at tryouts but I think I'd prefer to talk to the parents who left the team to get their perspectives!

 

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Great points made by Karma and Loganwest. It is sometimes hard to see what a coach has planned when they are not up front and honest. The good ones are both of these.(This is not something a parent can control) My hat goes off to the good ones that teach well and keep their word. The first team that failed us was in fact a great coach and team the first yr. but the 2nd yr. on this team fell through because the coach decided to move the team up well after all try outs were done and teams were full all money was payed. When this happened the focus went to the older core, we as well as others on team saw what was happening and I was the 1st to drop me dd back on a team of her age where she dominated at her own age.
That team desolved and we played with same org. on 97 team and the 98s took a back seat again. This has made my dd a better player yet the original post was basically about all the girls out there that are misled and I do know that the good coaches are up front and honest and thats why their teams stay strong because there is no fine print. Example of fine print, one of these teams had a non parent college coach but they forgot to tell us that she would very seldom be at games or practice, then there is the grandpa non parent coach and it goes on and on. Glad I put my seat belt on. lol.