how tough???

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Question.... I hear alot of parents talk about how "tough" there kid is. How tough should a kid need to be at 12u? My DD is a catcher, she is tough, but when she is sick to the point of vomiting , and refuses to come out of a game what do I do? Do I be the dad who says "your sick, we'll put in our backup"... or do I be the dad who says "My DD caught when she was sicker than a dog, she sure is tough?" How tough does she need to be? There's no scouts, its not a showcase, and its only pool play. I think she has that attitude I love, but should I let her play when she is that sick? If I pull her my name will be mud, she loves the game. Frustrated here!?

 

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#1 job is take care of the kid...I do however let some play if they say they are good... hate to take away from the "toughness" lol. I would imagine I would pull her, some are actually too tough for their own good you know! Got a couple of those.

 

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When I think of tough I think of taking a ball to the shin and still stmaking the play, or a catcher blocking the plate and taking the hit. It doesn't matter how tough you are when it comes to heat stroke, you can shake off pain, you can't shake off your body shutting down.

 

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At 7 years old my DD was playing in a rec ball game. She kept coming over between innings and laying at my feet. It was a hot day and she kept saying she was really tired. I kept getting on her and telling her to get her butt out there and play. We left and she told me she was really sick. Took her temp and it was 103.6. I asked why she didn't tell me she was sick. Her response was "you wouldn't have let me play my game." It is funny because the kids push themselves...it isn't about how much we push them. Sometimes unless you dig, you might not even know they don't feel well. They are tough in spite of us and they know that we are looking out for them so they keep the truth from us. I don't know the answer but I know that if they want to play sometimes you just have to let them.....maybe it is a good work ethic but you better believe if I was throwing up or had a fever I would be on the couch lol.

 

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When I think of tough I think of taking a ball to the shin and still stmaking the play, or a catcher blocking the plate and taking the hit. It doesn't matter how tough you are when it comes to heat stroke, you can shake off pain, you can't shake off your body shutting down.

I asked her if it was the heat, she said no. She was not feeling good on the way up to the tourney. Yeah if I thought it was heat related, don't care how tough she thinks she is, she would've gotten pulled for that one! Plus, she loves when kids try to score at home, she loves those collisions! Lol

 

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Sick to the point of vomiting = come out of the game. Coach or anybody else doesn't like it? How cares.

The only time I will every overrule a coach is when my child's well being is at stake and vomiting is my little clue that something isn't right.

If it was that it was hot and she just chugged a gatorade and it came back up is one thing, actual vomiting is another.

 

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Sick to the point of vomiting = come out of the game. Coach or anybody else doesn't like it? How cares.

The only time I will every overrule a coach is when my child's well being is at stake and vomiting is my little clue that something isn't right.

If it was that it was hot and she just chugged a gatorade and it came back up is one thing, actual vomiting is another.

Yeah I guess then the thought of dehydration would come up? I had her drinking alot of water after that, shy stuck it out. But tonight she still feeling bad and elimination starts tomorrow!? Getting chills and all flu like symptoms. She may not have a choice in the morning because mom might step in and she overrules both of us! Lol

 

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Last saturday we had practice and near the end my daughter (she was playing the middle chasing balls in BP) started crying and threw up. I asked what was wrong and she said she was so hot and her head hurt bad. I had her go sit out in the shade and grab some cold rags. I asked why she didn't tell me she aws getting that over heated so I could have her cool down and her response was "because we were busy practicing"

 

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Last saturday we had practice and near the end my daughter (she was playing the middle chasing balls in BP) started crying and threw up. I asked what was wrong and she said she was so hot and her head hurt bad. I had her go sit out in the shade and grab some cold rags. I asked why she didn't tell me she aws getting that over heated so I could have her cool down and her response was "because we were busy practicing"

Isn't it amazing how some girls just love this game? Sometimes I don't think they realize how much they do love it.

 

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First, children are not expected to know how to make, what I would term, adult "parenting" decisions. That is what being a parent is all about. Sometimes the decisions you make about your own children are not "popular" with other adults. No one knows your own like you do, and no one loves your kids like you do. Being a parent means deciding between when a kid is "being tough" and when their health is in jeopardy - and many time that is a very tough decision - unique for each parent and child. But that is the difference between children and adults.

 

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You also have to remember that kids are completely different from adults in their physiology. We were taught this in EMT school. Children/kids have high abilities to unconsciously compensate for physical ailments. But as a result, they also crash much harder and faster. Many times in the emergency room, a treatment for the same ailment in an adult would actually worsen a child's condition. That is why sometimes your kid will come to you sick as a dog and vomiting because their bodies have compensated to keep them going whereas us adults would recognize the beginning symptons and our bodies react more appropriately and timely. As with everything else in life, that elusive common sense of moderation always seems to be that, elusive. My oldest is a pitcher in college, her oldest younger sister is a catcher soon to be playing in college and I love watching them come back from hits, fatigue and adversity. They have those traits because they were pushed at 10u, 12u, etc...but to a point. At those ages I was criticized by many people for being too hard on the two of them but I believe the pushing to be the best and toughest on the field, make them take pride in those traits now, on and off the field. I don't know how tough they really are, but all you can do is what you think is best and hope it wasn't the worst!!

 

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First, children are not expected to know how to make, what I would term, adult "parenting" decisions. That is what being a parent is all about. Sometimes the decisions you make about your own children are not "popular" with other adults. No one knows your own like you do, and no one loves your kids like you do. Being a parent means deciding between when a kid is "being tough" and when their health is in jeopardy - and many time that is a very tough decision - unique for each parent and child. But that is the difference between children and adults.

I agree with that, but to be honest with you, I'm not concerned about upsetting the other parents with my decision. Your right, nobody loves their DD as much as then parent does. I don't believe her "health" was at risk, at least not to the point of thinking anything drastic was going to happen. Then again I'm not a doctor. Well see this morning how she's doing. Good luck to all today in their play.

 

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Hope she feels better

 

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Hope she feels better

thank you so much.

 

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I hope you understand that I was NOT pointing fingers or placing any blame in my comments. My point was that each parent/child relationship is unique and you cannot use a cookie-cutter approach. Every kid has a differing degree of "toughness", but that should never preclude how you deal with serious health issues. No matter how tough they pretend to be, they are still kids who need adults to make decisions for them.

I am guilty of not getting basic first aid training when my DD was playing. Looking back, the least I should have done was get basic first aid training, and fully understand the symptoms of heat related illness (heat exhaustion/stroke), treatment and prevention.

 

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I hope you understand that I was NOT pointing fingers or placing any blame in my comments. My point was that each parent/child relationship is unique and you cannot use a cookie-cutter approach. Every kid has a differing degree of "toughness", but that should never preclude how you deal with serious health issues. No matter how tough they pretend to be, they are still kids who need adults to make decisions for them.

I am guilty of not getting basic first aid training when my DD was playing. Looking back, the least I should have done was get basic first aid training, and fully understand the symptoms of heat related illness (heat exhaustion/stroke), treatment and prevention.

no worries. No offense taken by any of your comments.

 

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My DD is a catcher and was catching a game at 12u. She was moving her head around a lot behind the plate. When she came off the field I asked what was up and she was getting a migraine. She gets blurry spots in the middle of her vision when getting a migraine and was moving her head trying to see the ball.. Told her she has to tell the coach and pull herself from the game when that happens. She was going to play through it. She upchucked shortly after that into a water jug which I threw out. Found out hot dogs give her a migraine.

 

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Would you have sent her to school?