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Member
Lisa Cohn and Patrick Cohn, Ph.D.
When it comes to confidence in sports, athletes can be their own worst enemies.
That's because they hang onto thoughts that hurt their confidence and performance-not understanding, of course, that they're undermining their experience in sports.
For example, they may constantly berate themselves by telling themselves they're too small, too slow or not experienced enough.
Or they hold super high expectations, telling themselves they MUST nab all the rebounds, score most of the points in a game, or make no mistakes.
Another no-no is the "I can't" statement. Young athletes say things like, "I can't kick a ball far enough; I can't make that kind of pass."
They even hold onto silly beliefs that they think will improve their performance. They may insist that they wear the same blue socks every game, and that to wash them would be bad luck.
These beliefs keep athletes stuck. Yet, they're very common--and they hurt kids' confidence!
But you, as sports parents, can help them identify and then understand why these beliefs hurt them. You can also help them overcome them.
To begin with, help your sports kids identify some of the beliefs-like the ones above.
--Do they call themselves negative names?
--Do they hold super high expectations?
--Do they tell themselves, "I can't." Do they hang onto silly ideas about what brings them good luck? Once you've helped your sports kids identify these beliefs, you want to help them replace these beliefs with more positive ones.
If, for example, your sports kids says, "I need to nab all the rebounds," help them understand that this will put undue pressure on them and cause them to feel frustrated if-and when-they miss a rebound.
Ask them to replace those high expectations with more reasonable ones-smaller, more achievable goals.
"I'd like to be quick on my feet playing defense today," for example. You want them to focus on the process-not so much on the score and on their statistics.
While they're practicing, they want to remind themselves to avoid negative thinking and high expectations. It won't happen overnight-but we guarantee, it will work, with time and patience!
"I applaud what you're doing and I'm impressed with your work."
~John Tauer, a professor in the Dept. of Psychology at University of St. Thomas and Assistant men's basketball coach.
When it comes to confidence in sports, athletes can be their own worst enemies.
That's because they hang onto thoughts that hurt their confidence and performance-not understanding, of course, that they're undermining their experience in sports.
For example, they may constantly berate themselves by telling themselves they're too small, too slow or not experienced enough.
Or they hold super high expectations, telling themselves they MUST nab all the rebounds, score most of the points in a game, or make no mistakes.
Another no-no is the "I can't" statement. Young athletes say things like, "I can't kick a ball far enough; I can't make that kind of pass."
They even hold onto silly beliefs that they think will improve their performance. They may insist that they wear the same blue socks every game, and that to wash them would be bad luck.
These beliefs keep athletes stuck. Yet, they're very common--and they hurt kids' confidence!
But you, as sports parents, can help them identify and then understand why these beliefs hurt them. You can also help them overcome them.
To begin with, help your sports kids identify some of the beliefs-like the ones above.
--Do they call themselves negative names?
--Do they hold super high expectations?
--Do they tell themselves, "I can't." Do they hang onto silly ideas about what brings them good luck? Once you've helped your sports kids identify these beliefs, you want to help them replace these beliefs with more positive ones.
If, for example, your sports kids says, "I need to nab all the rebounds," help them understand that this will put undue pressure on them and cause them to feel frustrated if-and when-they miss a rebound.
Ask them to replace those high expectations with more reasonable ones-smaller, more achievable goals.
"I'd like to be quick on my feet playing defense today," for example. You want them to focus on the process-not so much on the score and on their statistics.
While they're practicing, they want to remind themselves to avoid negative thinking and high expectations. It won't happen overnight-but we guarantee, it will work, with time and patience!
"I applaud what you're doing and I'm impressed with your work."
~John Tauer, a professor in the Dept. of Psychology at University of St. Thomas and Assistant men's basketball coach.
