Local kids became superstars

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well, i love to admit that Scott does have a point. We fostered an then adopted our daughter around 3 years later at the age of 14. I told her recently that she's more than a blessing to us, because despite my best efforts to keep her "involved" (you should have heard the stories we were getting about foster kids then, downright unbelievable), she's shown and proven to me over the years that she's been making the right choices. Now those around her, like some of her school ball an travel ball mates? not so much, and thats not discounting lessons upon lessons, the long ride home fueled by dads rants, playing on the "right" team, etc, etc.
And now that my DD has begun her 18u season, I felt myself cheated somewhat, not because of the people we've met, or the friends that she's made, but the illusion of "family" time brought on by travel softball. You want to know what its done for some people? divorce, a kid who hates softball or an egotistical, golden child, brat. What do I have? luckily none of the three.
So Scott, I know what you mean, big fella.

 

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I guess all things in Moderation....yep, raised 3 kids...Volleyball player/musician....she is now Engineer making more money than mom..and yep we did lessons etc...
Baseball player...yep pitching lessons, travel, unfortunately surgery for career ending shoulder issues but he is a happy well adjusted college student that still enjoys spending time with his sisters and parents and oh yeh straight A's
Softball player...hours and hours in car doing travel ball, pitching lessons, hitting lessons, etc...and yep, now her college team's #1...junior premed...and yes , she too loves her family especially her Dad who was with her every step of the way...will say not once did we make a kid go to a camp, lesson,team, or work out that they didn't ask for...so no I guess I am for the "involved parent" cause I have 3 excellant examples of the positives that can come from being an involved parent...OH, no Criminal record or Substance abuse...

 

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well, i love to admit that Scott does have a point. We fostered an then adopted our daughter around 3 years later at the age of 14. I told her recently that she's more than a blessing to us, because despite my best efforts to keep her "involved" (you should have heard the stories we were getting about foster kids then, downright unbelievable), she's shown and proven to me over the years that she's been making the right choices. Now those around her, like some of her school ball an travel ball mates? not so much, and thats not discounting lessons upon lessons, the long ride home fueled by dads rants, playing on the "right" team, etc, etc.
And now that my DD has begun her 18u season, I felt myself cheated somewhat, not because of the people we've met, or the friends that she's made, but the illusion of "family" time brought on by travel softball. You want to know what its done for some people? divorce, a kid who hates softball or an egotistical, golden child, brat. What do I have? luckily none of the three.
So Scott, I know what you mean, big fella.

Statman - Is it travel ball and sports causing the divorce, etc, or a lack of commitment to the more important things in life? I don't think sports cause the problems, I think the problems would be there regardless. The "illusion" of family time you discuss is only as good as you make it. It is "family time" for our family. We purchased a camper last year, and are staying at campgrounds around the state. Between games, I get to hang out with my son and younger daughter, and we spend more time throwing a ball or simply walking to a concession stand and talking. If I was at home every weekend, I'd be doing the six million things that needed done and would be promising to throw that ball or do whatever once I got done with my project. We all know how that turns out.

If any moron thinks its about having a superstar and if you don't, you should just quit, then they really don't have a good grasp on the concept of life. It's always about being the best you can be at whatever you choose to do. It's about achieving and improving yourself. If everyone thought that if you can't be a superstar at whatever, then you should just give up and quit, there wouldn't be many doctors, lawyers, or anything else in the world.

Maybe I misread this thread and am off-base, but, it is JMHO.

 

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i will say that I've had alot of growing up since we starte back in 12u rec ball, as a dad, husband, teacher and person. But Scott does point out the people who don't have that background, that personal sense of being committed to anything but your own glory. I've seen both sides. I was once THAT parent who wanted the trophies and the perfect family but not willing to do anything but the "projected" image of what my role was in my own family. Now having been there an learned some lessons, I can say that we, my family, didn't need softball. Scott's post is for all the families/dads who think it actually means something.

 

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i will say that I've had alot of growing up since we starte back in 12u rec ball, as a dad, husband, teacher and person. But Scott does point out the people who don't have that background, that personal sense of being committed to anything but your own glory. I've seen both sides. I was once THAT parent who wanted the trophies and the perfect family but not willing to do anything but the "projected" image of what my role was in my own family. Now having been there an learned some lessons, I can say that we, my family, didn't need softball. Scott's post is for all the families/dads who think it actually means something.

The glory of winning a trophy isn't about the winning for me, but about these young ladies achieving something through hard work and commitment to something. You say you didn't need softball, but did it have some part of you growing as a person? What other avenue would or could you have taken to learn the same ideals? If you have learned any of these lessons during your softball experience, then it did serve a purpose beyond trophy-hunting, and I think that means more than a trophy ever could. If it wasn't softball, it could have been basketball, football, baseball, or any other non-sport activities. I learn something new about myself and try to grow as a person every day. That includes meeting and learning from all the young ladies and people that I have met during travel softball. So, to me, it does mean something.

My reading of the first post was that there are a bunch of loser kids out there that should give it up. We might have a different take on exactly what was meant. Maybe you know and have a better understanding of the first poster than I do. The perception I have is of a bully that feels the need to put other people down because he has a self-esteem problem.

 

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Re: Local kids became supertars

JMHO. But i would think Scott's last 2 post were just a commercial for spcsports since it is that time of the year. We keep checking it out to see what stupid thing he can say next.;&

If that's the case, its a pretty sad commercial in my eyes. Stir the pot, I get his game. Start threads and post negativity and B.S. Criticize parents for trying to keep their kids active. It's just another ridiculous waste of everyone's time. One thing his posts have accomplished is convince me where not to shop for sporting goods.

 

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If he was a commercial for my business, I'd tell him to "Stifle it" as he'd be an embarrassment to my company......

Yes, all kids are not going to be superstars, but to have them learn commit to excellence, to team, support, friendship and learn work ethics is more important in life for any of them. Perhaps he'd rather see them drop out of school, hang out on the corner, peddle or use drugs instead? Yes, only a few will go on and play at a Major College, How many will go on and play elsewhere? Many more, with most of that due to the individuals who on this board support, versus belittle the leaders of tomorrow....

Time to flush that turd already....

 

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Sometimes the message can be lost...Ive heard many college coaches of big time programs, most recently Patti Gasso of Oklahoma pretty much say the samething Dice is saying. Sports are to organized, kids don't just play anymore. Remember your youth, countless hours spent outside playing pick up games. Now there are leagues, coaches for everything. Winning and losing has taken a back seat to participation. Look at our sport, kids playing 7 games in a weekend, naturally kids don't feel a sense of urgency to win every game. IMO we are STARTING to lose our sense of competitiveness.

Just my 2 cents

 

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How come whenever you make that statement, we all say "Uber's a smart guy - that makes sense"?

But when Cilenti says it, he insults people by saying "Look at the losers who are all wasting their money"?...

 

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Uber ... you and Ms. Gasso are right ... kids just don't play anymore ... but I don't think it's too much organized sports that is the cause of it. There are a lot of dynamics that have changed ... kids have many other distractions --- video games, DVD's, IPOD's, cell phones, etc. ... families have changed --- both parents typically work (and have to) and kids require some kind of structure ... and philosophies have changed (whether we like it or not) --- more emphasis on self-esteem and less on competitiveness. I guess I'm glad we still have organized sports, because otherwise our kids wouldn't be getting any physical activity at all. I'm not sure what the answer is ...

 

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To add to Coachjwb's comments....When I grew up, all of my friends lived within 1 mile of my home. I was able to get to everywhere I needed to, by way of my bicycle. Pick-up games were easy. But geographies have changed. Things are more spread out. Kids can't just get together without mom & dad getting them there. (at least in this town) And yes, kids' lives are busier. My DD has a lot more homework than I ever did. She is much more "on the go" and doesn't have the downtime, but I don't think that's because of sports. If she wasn't playing ball, she'd be doing something else, but people (kids & adults) just don't have the downtime that they use to have.

 

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Re: Local kids became supertars

Let me add the rest of this witch was supposed to be at tail end of original post! As I see all the parents and their little soon to be super stars I think of some of the great hitters Mickey Mantle, Ted Williams and Pitchers Stan Musial, Nolan Ryan and Josh Gibson and I wonder if their parents carted them to hitting and pitching coaches for 40 dollars an hour sessions and the if they were given the character building speech during the car ride home at 12 years? I can see it now Mr. Musial rolling to the park three days a week with his bucket and visor working on the weeks lesson!

Witch makes my case in most cases a donkey doesn't win the Kentucky Derby!

After reading a few of this guys posts I have come to the conclusion that there is no way this is a real poster. No one can butcher spelling and english like he does and not be playing a prank. No one can be so distorted in their thoughts that they believe anything that they are saying. If this was another site I frequent I would say this guy is a plant - just being asked to act like a moron and stir things up. I don't think OFC does those things, at least they didn't BITD.

BTW - someone up there needs to get to that sporting goods company and tell them what great PR this yoyo is doing for them.

 

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Sometimes the message can be lost...Ive heard many college coaches of big time programs, most recently Patti Gasso of Oklahoma pretty much say the samething Dice is saying. Sports are to organized, kids don't just play anymore. Remember your youth, countless hours spent outside playing pick up games. Now there are leagues, coaches for everything. Winning and losing has taken a back seat to participation. Look at our sport, kids playing 7 games in a weekend, naturally kids don't feel a sense of urgency to win every game. IMO we are STARTING to lose our sense of competitiveness.

Just my 2 cents

You see a guy that gets it! Just like a certain guy who recently had some legal troubles once told me about most of the parents on this site! " They wouldn't know what real softball was if it jumped up and slapped then in the face";&

 

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You see a guy that gets it! Just like a certain guy who recently had some legal troubles once told me about most of the parents on this site! " They wouldn't know what real softball was if it jumped up and slapped then in the face";&

You Would refer to a convicted perv as a guy with legal troubles. That don't surprise me at all

 

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Sports have become more organized for one reason...MONEY...
When I was young there were 10 to 20 of us that would show up at the local park and play sports all day. Baseball during baseball season, football during football basketball during Basketball...heck we even played hockey when the BB court froze over, but no one made money on us playing all day except the carryout accross the street where we bought our gatorade.. Now its all about money How much How quick...
My son bowls for his HS team and also bowls travel...I know bowling right....this must make him a loser right NOT...no...NO kid is a loser NO MATTER what sport they play, Hobbie they are in or club they may be a part of.... Most of these kids are doing what they want to do or what they can do, My son tried out for Baseball and got cut his freshman year and was crushed...He is not a bad ball player just not as good as some others out there, He thought I would be dissappointed in him because I played baseball when I was in HS...he started bowling a month later and now has more scholarship money won in 2 years than I could have imagined....

Bottom line is NOT every kid will be great at what they do but should be loved for who they are... so when I pull up and see a parking lot full of cars and go inside and see a TON of parants cheering on the kids at a kickball game... s o c c e r game... or anything Im just glad there are parents that are out there who care. nothing bothers me more than to have a parent drop there kids of at an event and drive away and say "good luck I will pick you up when your done"...JMO

 

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Yeah .... well, as someone who has immersed their kid into "programs" in multiple sports, I can say that it feels good to be less organized now. Some kids are gym rats and LOVE to be doing it all day, every day, and continually absorb every morsal or explanation, mentoring, and muscle memory. Others get bored, lose the "thrill", and tune out like zombies. As the proud owner of a 16u you who does less and less within the machine, and enjoys it more and more on "her" passion rather than mine ........ well, I will just say that we both enjoy having our own sports lives, and sharing them together.

I suppose every kid is a little different .... but there is indeed a lot to say for just letting them run out there and play and compete to their heart's content, without having every angle and lever critiqued between at-bats and reported promptly to their hitting/pitching guru during the week ......

 

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well stated Pic dad

 

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You see a guy that gets it! Just like a certain guy who recently had some legal troubles once told me about most of the parents on this site! " They wouldn't know what real softball was if it jumped up and slapped then in the face";&

We just can't get to the point where if your daughter is not playing the Pac 10 or Big Ten or at a Top Twenty type program it's not "real softball" Thats just plain arrogant and stupid . Are there rookie parents on here who are uninformed about upper level travel and recruiting ? Yep -- I WAS ONE OF THEM ! But this site, and a large handful of great people who use it , have been instrumental (and patient LOL) in helping me and I'd assume helping 100's of others learn the ropes.

 

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We just can't get to the point where if your daughter is not playing the Pac 10 or Big Ten or at a Top Twenty type program it's not "real softball" Thats just plain arrogant and stupid . Are there rookie parents on here who are uninformed about upper level travel and recruiting ? Yep -- I WAS ONE OF THEM ! But this site, and a large handful of great people who use it , have been instrumental (and patient LOL) in helping me and I'd assume helping 100's of others learn the ropes.

Back at you Dan ... I was one of "those parents" as well. Now, I just want her to b happy, and unlike some unfortunate situations, my #1 & #2 goals are to have a healthy happy dd, and to have a fantastic lifelong relationship with her ... without any 2nd guessing whther I was truly in her (the real "her") corner, all along .... versus forcing her into "my" corner

If she is good enough to play for OSU, Tennessee, Florida, or Washington .... it'll work out. Talent like that is hard to hide. Reality is that she is now looking at colleges that she wants to attend, and if softball (or basketball) works out then great ..... if not, who cares. I know that it will NOT be OSU, Tennessee, Florida, or Washington though lol. Hey Miami, Ashland, Kent, Muskingum, and some other nice schools with awesome coaches and competitive programs aren't exactly a poke in the eye with a sharp stick either ..... I listen to her and help to guide her with leadership these days rather than managing and directing her. We both actually like this better (well, I've "learned" to like it, lol).

Happy holidays to you and yours brother!

 

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Well stated Pickle..... Bigger things in life to worry about...