Softball Jokes/ Funny Quotes

[Mr. Soft Balls]

TOP TEN SIGNS YOUR TEAM WON'T BE IN THE CHAMPIONSHIP GAME

10. Team's idea of a double play is two songs back-to-back on the radio.

9. The most popular phrase is, "Who's up? Are you up? I'm not up! She's up."

8. Players refuse to slide for fear of ruining their hair and nails.

7. The Coach's new exercise video features his walking to the mound after every pitch.

6. Players keep pointing at the bat and saying "Is this some kinda ball-wackin' stick?"

5. You get yelled at by the umps because your team is slow getting on the field, and they are all still at the concession stand.

4. Players always complain because you can't mathematically give 110%.

3. On pop fouls the catcher actually has to come out of the dugout.

2. Your best hitter's nickname is "Slugger" because she's already beat up four girls in this inning.

1. The team's chant in the field is "Hey batter, batter, hit it at her!"

 

[Converse Kid]

A little girl was overheard talking to herself as she strutted through the backyard, wearing her baseball cap and toting a ball and bat: “I’m the greatest hitter in the world,” she announced. Then, she tossed the ball into the air, swung at it, and missed. “Strike One!” she yelled.Undaunted, she picked up the ball and said again, “I’m the greatest hitter in the world!” She tossed the ball into the air. When it came down she swung again and missed. “Strike Two!” she cried.The girl paused a moment to examine her bat and ball carefully. She spit on her hands and rubbed them together. She straightened her cap and said once more, “I’m the greatest hitter in the world!” Again she tossed the ball up in the air and swung at it. She missed. “Strike Three!”“Wow!” she exclaimed. “I’m the greatest pitcher in the world.”