[/QUOTE} She sits on the bench the entire time and is not being developed. She hates the team and hates the coach. We missed it because of her brother's HS graduation the coach knew about in December. The daughter is not very good but plays the entire time and of course, is getting better. One time we were late because she told us the wrong field. The daughter was spitting sunflower seeds in the girls' faces and I told her to stop and ever since she has an attitude with us.
I have to support yocoach's questioning and response. It sounds more like you are unhappy and feel mistreated so why are you still there? You say you told this volunteer coach in December about one date you would miss in late May or June which would be normal timing for a graduation. Did you remind them in advance or simply assume they'd remember 5-6 months later? My guess is you did not because you've been unhappy the entire time so this was one more way to encourage the feud. My guess is the 2 times mentioned are not the only times you've been late. You went to the wrong field and feel mistreated or being targeted. Were you the only one? If targeted, why did you stay?
Bullying shouldn't be tolerated and spitting sunflower seeds into somebody's face is just that------bullying. So how old are these girls? The act sounds like a lil brat to me and some times the kids need to be left to handle these situations themselves. If you felt you should intervene, why didn't you go to the father/coach? She's not your daughter. You don't know their situation. Maybe this kid has issues beyond your knowledge and this whole thing is more than you should be handling.
Don't you see, your own actions could be fueling the resentment.
I can't sympathize with you if you continue to go back into the abuse. Stand up for yourself but first you need to undo the very things that has them talking about you to begin with. There is an extreme possibility, if this is a travel team situation, they will be working to replace you for the next season. There are a few coaches that will keep you around for your money but even with that scenario, if you guys are not contributing and continuing to be a headache they will find another to fill the roster spot. If this is a Rec ball situation you should have already approached the director to file your complaints. Don't expect any sympathy there if you have been contributing to the attitude by being late and not doing more beyond game days to improve your status on the roster. That volunteer coach has an entire bench to be concerned about. It's not just about you.
The original post and response back to me are indicators that you possibly created a lot of this stuff yourself by your actions. I sense your daughter is young. I sense you've had some reasonable experiences in other endeavors-----probably because they tolerated you having things on your terms. Word of advice; you can seek out what falls within your selfish scope of reality or you can choose to change and be more respectful of others and your surroundings. With a respectful attitude you will get a mutual respect of others that will open more doors in the future.
Going thru life with a tunnel-vision attitude is a lonely path to travel.