Bad 1st year experience

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This was my daughter's first year on a Select Travel Team -- her team has since added players and several of the original players are sitting on the bench each and every game -- I feel like we just spent a ton of money to watch our daughter sit the bench -- DO I think she learned this year yes, do I think she was treated fairly NO -- why is it that the coach's kids always play every game and every inning regardless of making the same mistakes each and every game.....my daughter makes a mistake and she sits the bench for several games in a row...............i guess that sort of goes along with the territory of joing a team thats a majority of people from the same area/neighborhood -- the outsiders are there for the $$ and to fill up the roster. Just makes me sad for my daugher -

 

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How many players were on the original roster? How many do you have now? Just curious. You'll get to start new in a few weeks.

 

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I believe they have added 3 new players to the original roster -- Yes we can start over -- I want a team that will groom the players -- is it always about winning?

 

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IMHO I think the coaches dd's play regardless because their dads/moms donate their time coaching. Fair not really, but the reality is, it is the same everywhere.

I also feel that all players regardless who they are should EARN their time!!

 

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and in a somewhat weak defense of coach's DD's....more often than not, that DD puts in more work time (non-practice instructional time) simply because their dad has a routine or they see a hitting/pitching coach...so taken that into play, they may deserve more of the time because the coach is seeing the effort being made...unfair sure, but it is what it is...
just from experience, I've seen a total of 6 coaches DD's, 3 of them pitchers. ?2 saw the majority of playing time, while others were benched for hitting/defense...
and did i mention the pressure a coach's DD has during everygame? ?ask my poor DD!

and being that this is your DD's first year, I'm sure there were struggles. ?I know mine didn't absorb the sun and vault herself to the leadoff position simply by walking on the field (and it still hasn't happened yet, btw)...so, take the first year as a learning experience, find a team that has open positions, post more on the OFC, eat more brauts and enjoy the time with your DD!

 

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Just really left a bad taste in my mouth -- hard to take when you see your child not being given the same opportunity

 

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chestnut, every team,coach and organization is different .To say that all coaches are the same is unfair.I personally have a rule that every girl plays every game ,no girl sits more than once in a tournament and by doing this your players want to play and you have a better team .I have seen alot of 10-u teams this year were the same 2-3 girls sit the entire tournament except to courtesy run !I am a head coach and I can say with little reservation that my daughter sits more than anyone and she is 1 of our top 3-4 players.It's all about finding a team that your comfortable with ,not every girl fits with a Heart of Ohio, Laser's or Stingrays team.Go to a couple of tryouts talk to coaches, parents and do some research it will pay off. Good Luck Bruce

 

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Thanks Bruce - Also, please don't misunderstand I did not say that all coaches are the same -- I do want to find a team that will recognize my daughter's talents -- Which team do you coach and what age level? Just trying to get a feel for other organziations........

 

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and in a somewhat weak defense of coach's DD's....more often than not, that DD puts in more work time (non-practice instructional time) simply because their dad has a routine or they see a hitting/pitching coach...so taken that into play, they may deserve more of the time because the coach is seeing the effort being made...unfair sure, but it is what it is...
!

Understandable, sure. However, coaches dd's are not the only ones putting in extra time. My dd, for example goes to a private pitching and hitting coach, plus practices everyday with us at home. She is not a chronic bench sitter by any means, but sees very little if any rubber time. But thats okay. We and she knows that the talent is there. She has improved so much.

Chestnut1, just do your best to keep your dd's attitude positive and take her to tryouts. Just ask the right questions and practice practice practice. Next year will be a better on for your dd and mine I am sure!!

 

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sad....

and that is true..from experience, i would advise all parents to get your kids in training during the season...don't wait until she's hitting .185!

and in the end, sit or play, did they improve over time (which sometimes cannot be measured in stats/wins/losses)? i'm thankful DD got some major catching time this year, and I'm grateful for the opp, but it had nothing to do with me.....okay, maybe i DID pad the stats for the head coaches DD, but i swear i wont do it again...

 

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With all due respect, Chestnut, the good news is that we are fast approaching tryout season for next year, and your experiences this year can afford you an opportunity to know what to look for (or steer clear of) in the future.
Fight the natural temptation to want to look in the ?rear view mirror?. ?You will do best for your kid, if you focus all your energy on what road you want to take in the future.
Absolutely, tournament ball is a huge commitment ? and one that clearly warrants you to ask many questions.
Keep your spirits up, and Very best wishes!

 

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Thanks for the comments -- I will focus on being positive and looking for more of an "objectionable" vs "neighborhood friends" team...........

 

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Chestnut, I coach the 10u Heart of Ohio Xtreme .There are alot of Great Organizations out there , PM and I can send you a few depending on what area you live in !Unfortuanetly there are some bad ones too that will tell you anything to get your dd on their team.thanks Bruce

 

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. ?. -- is it always about winning?

Unfortunately, as harsh as it sounds, for some, yes, it is all about winning.
For others, it?s all about improving; for others it?s fun, or teamwork, or sportsmanship (or even long rides in dusty muddy cars, and hot, sweaty days with cold concession food and warm drinks, and the dirtiest, smelliest clothes possible, etc.!)

Hopefully it?s about a combination of all of those things ? but even then it is different for everyone. ?Your challenge is to keep figuring what is the best fit for your daughter. ?Does she aspire to play Division 1 college ball?, or, maybe division III?, or, maybe she just wants to have fun playing at a somewhat more competitive level. ?Would she rather play a lot on a less competitive team, or play less on a stronger team?

By the way, if you don?t have an older teenager, prepare yourself for the inevitable probability of your daughter some day deciding she wants to go in a whole different direction. ?There is only one guarantee in this: ?if you have hair now, you will lose some or it will soon go to grey. ?Oh yeah, and your wallett gets much lighter, too. ?Most importantly though, if you and your daughter work through and talk through these challenges together, you will give her great life lessons that she can then benefit from when she encounters that jerk of a boss or a person or a situation that we know is just a matter of time as you help her grow into an adult.

At the least, you are creating memories you and her will cherish long after you have forgotten those times you were not too happy with playing time, or whatever.

 

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Chestnut1 you can always try to ask for to speak to current and ex-players of the coach that would be coaching your daughter. This may give you an idea of the coaches true desire be winning at all costs. Or to win, but develope the talent on the team. Keep practicing, keep your attitudes positive and good luck!

 

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sad....

and in the end, sit or play, did they improve over time (which sometimes cannot be measured in stats/wins/losses)? ?i'm thankful DD got some major catching time this year, and I'm grateful for the opp, but it had nothing to do with me.....okay, maybe i DID pad the stats for the head coaches DD, but i swear i wont do it again...

WoW! I can not believe somebody would admit that! That is awful that you would change the stats so your DD could play. More often than not, the coaches kids will get to play more. There is nothing that can be changed about that. It is just daddy ball all the way around and unfortunately it will probably never go away. What really is not fair is when you have those girls out there making error after error, but nobody even thinks twice about replacing them because of their last name and who their dad is. I never once had to get a playing spot through my dad. I worked my way up from the bottom and turned out to be very successful. Advice to the younger ones just starting out in travel softball would be to hang in there and find a team that can build together. Your time will come where you can shine, but it might take a little while to come about.

One other little note:
Avoid teams where 5 or more dads think that they are the coaches because their daughters will play. Leaving only 4 spots open, and depending on age... those spots will probably be in the outfield. (I am speaking from experience and in the younger age groups)

 

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sftbllangel...you don't seriously believe Statman actually padded the stats do you??! If so, you obviously haven't seen enough of his postings to know his sense of humor!

 

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Yep -- You are exactly right about the Daddy ball -- the select team we are own has 4 coaches and each daughter plays every inning of every game regardless of the number of errors made over and over.......and god forbid if you say anything

 

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sftbllangel...you don't seriously believe Statman actually padded the stats do you??! ?If so, you obviously haven't seen enough of his postings to know his sense of humor! ?

Yep!! I believe statman padded stats. I was told if my dd played for them, she would be a .750 hitter gauranteed!!! It's true!!!!

 

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We have seen it all, daddy ball, coach's daughter, who pays more money, you name it. The bottom line is the coaches should take an overall look at their team at the end of the season and see if they have improved. If they have not then they need to take a look at themselves as a coach and maybe give it up. Yes the older divisions are and should be about winning but the younger 12u and down should be about developing players. By replacing players on a team that went thru tryouts and was chosen to be on the team, than that is the coaches fault. You should not have to keep replacing players to be productive. Taking lessons outside of practice is a must. That is the only way to get ahead.
Two days a week does not do it. It should be more like 4-5 days of practice to improve. When a coach selects a player they should make sure that they are getting instruction outside of practice. We are playing travel ball which involves money and lots of it. Unfortunately some of the natural excellent players will be left out.
This is a BIG reason why there is so many levels of travel ball teams. You are not happy with the coaching so you start your own team. Travel ball should be for the next level players not the ones that daddy wants to watch his kid play travel ball so he gets his own team together. The teams that have different players each year should tell you about the coaching and the team itself. The better teams and organizations see talent and develop it and in turn everyone is happy. (Playing time)
Good luck!! This problem has been around and will continue to be around until
someone comes up with a system where the coach has to pass a certain test and is monitored by more than their players and parents.

It is just a free for all.