Tim ... for the most part I agree with what you're saying ... if she's a stud player in the summer, has good grades, and can answer questions from a coach about things like this, then you're absolutely right.
But, with all due respect ...
a) not all players who want to play in college are true stud players that any college coach is going to scoop up regardless
b) players who decide not to play in high school definitely need to be doing something else instead (you said this too)
c) they still need to be able to answer the question why they didn't play in a way that is intelligent and respectful
d) how many players playing on scholarships in college didn't actually play HS ball? I'm sure you know a lot more scholarship players than me, but I haven't met one yet that didn't and, until I meet a couple, I'm not going to make that leap of faith and tell people it's OK and that college coaches don't care
My main point is that 90% of the potential players out there are going to send up red flags if they (and/or her parents) say that her HS school coach was an idiot, didn't know what he was doing, didn't play the best players, etc. ... and if she didn't do some other activity instead. They need to have a good answer to this question.