Cut the cord...

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Seeing this play out firsthand here locally with a kid .. shame really, but you nailed it 100%

same on my 14U team...it's remarkable, uber, how closely you've described it.

 

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one more:

-helicopter parents treats coaches dd like garbage.

 

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The 10U parents have yet to learn the value of a "RED" cup or and "McD's" ice tea cup can bring on a hot day at the ball field.
Because if they did know the value of the Cups they would be "DONE" hovering around the dugout.

At the end of the day, I often have dirt at the bottom of my sweet tea cup (especially if we play three games on sat). Cant figure out why? Beware of the straw. Its easy to get sloppy when you drink from that garden hose straw they give you;&

 

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Good Stuff Uber!! I was laughing at my desk reading that! Should be a fun year then for me. 1st year in travel and coach of 9U. Should I buy fuel for the copters incase one crashes?

Have a meeting early, it will not fix itself.

 

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I coach a College D1 head baseball coaches 2 daughters, I'm not going to lie I felt some pressure until we were working on hitting and I asked the one daughter how her dad wanted her to hit and she said, however you want me to hit haha. Great kids, if I send out an email looking for help shagging balls at practice he always comes. Plays catch with his son during practice until it's time to shag, when were done they go back to other diamond and play catch. This guy has forgotten more then I will ever know, yet he let's me do my job.

 

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I would like to ask a question to make sure that I am not a helicopter parent....

For the last 3 years, I have taken my dd to a slap hitting coach...that being said, over the three years, I have been at everyone, except maybe two lessons. So I have watched, and listened to her instructor take her from being a first time lefty, to being a what others have said a pretty good slapper.

Now on game days, I set down the first or third base line in my heavy duty lawn chair, with a camera or video camera watching the game, when I see her do something that I know her slapping coach would say, "why did it happen?" "Ok, so fix it" so I say it too, and then she does, and gets a base hit shooting it through the 5-6 hole.

Does that make me a helicopter parent? Or is that cheering her on?

 

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I would like to ask a question to make sure that I am not a helicopter parent....

For the last 3 years, I have taken my dd to a slap hitting coach...that being said, over the three years, I have been at everyone, except maybe two lessons. So I have watched, and listened to her instructor take her from being a first time lefty, to being a what others have said a pretty good slapper.

Now on game days, I set down the first or third base line in my heavy duty lawn chair, with a camera or video camera watching the game, when I see her do something that I know her slapping coach would say, "why did it happen?" "Ok, so fix it" so I say it too, and then she does, and gets a base hit shooting it through the 5-6 hole.

Does that make me a helicopter parent? Or is that cheering her on?

Yes and no. Depends on when you tell her to fix it. If in a game then yes. If on your own and in between games, if your coach hasn't pointed it out then no.

 

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Okay. I have to admit I was one of those parents in Strongsville last weekend. However, in my defense, DD was new to the team, the coaches and fastpitch in general (her first day other than to pick up her uniform and a private tryout). She played slowpitch until recently. She's been taking pitching lessons for about 6 months and was asked to pitch in the games (again, first time ever). Coaches told me if I see something she's doing wrong, yell and let her know. I kept my mouth shut except for one time when she got lazy and quit driving hard. Other than that, I kept silent other than to cheer the team and let her play. I let the coaches coach. I am also a rec ball coach moving from slowpitch into fastpitch so it's a whole new game for me as well. I've asked the coaches if they minded me hanging around the dugout to pick up pointers and strategies. They said that would be fine. I don't know if this qualifies me as a helicopter parent or not. I do know that I learned an awful lot though.

 

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As a 12u Manager/HC, I have hired 3 snipers to take out those copters. I've always called these parents a 3C. Camping Chair Coach.:lmao:

 

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As a 12u Manager/HC, I have hired 3 snipers to take out those copters. I've always called these parents a 3C. Camping Chair Coach.:lmao:

Note to self....take advice above!!

 

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Have a meeting early, it will not fix itself.

Thanks 01fire...I will. So far at practices it hasnt been bad. But I will address it. It's the first thing I do with my league team.

 

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Yes and no. Depends on when you tell her to fix it. If in a game then yes. If on your own and in between games, if your coach hasn't pointed it out then no.

Well, I would disagree, I am not hovering around her, hanging out in the dugout, every time she runs back in.

Telling her to "fix it" is no different than a parent saying "protect here you have 2 on you" if telling her to "fix it", from the First base foul line behind the fence from a lawn chair is being a "helicopter parent" Then it would be safe to say that in every game, Football, basketball, etc, when I hear a father say... "come on guys, wrap him up", from the grandstands makes him a helicopter parent at a football game... How about the fans that watch football on TV, are they helicopter fans?

Really?

I would agree, on those that rush back to the dugout, after every inning, telling her what she did wrong, and what she did right... standing on the backstop yelling after each pitch... YEP... Without any doubt... but telling her to "Fix it" yeah not so much.

 

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As a 12u Manager/HC, I have hired 3 snipers to take out those copters. I've always called these parents a 3C. Camping Chair Coach.:lmao:

LOLOLOLOLOLOL :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

 

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I'll give you the other side of all this.... if you as a parent or a parent/coach can give your daughter some advice that will help her during a game, and can help her grow, do you hold back? The "let the coaches coach" isn't always the best thing for her. Is the coach helping her? All the great advice that comes out of these type threads assume that the team and coaching staff is well-oiled and they are more knowledgeable than the parents. Is that always true? Heck no it isn't. My thoughts are "When someone can teach her more than I can, they can have her".

Having said all that we do try to minimize the interactions between the players and whatever is outside of the dugout. No going to sit with mom and dad when you are not in the lineup, no chatting with siblings on the back of the fence, etc. Of course since I help coach I'm probably one of the worst offenders when helicoptering around my daughter. I personally look forward, as I did with my son, when a competent school coach can take over during the HS season. Hopefully that happens.

 

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What would happen if you didn't give your kid in game tips? Is there a more productive time to give your kid tips then in game? Like maybe a time the opposing coach isn't around so your not tipping the other team off to a problem your kid might have?

 

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Mom and Dad;

Did you ever think that the coach on the bucket knows there is an issue but is waiting to see if your daughter will figure it out on her own and fix it?

We're not all blind and nor all stupid. We some times choose to let the kid grow up a little on her own. You had all the time in the world to help prepare her, now leave us alone for a few hours to do it our way and see if it works. FYI, we don't have time to come running to you to see if it's OK. Kids fall down when they learn to walk. It's what helps them decide that staying upright is better than picking themselves up every 3 seconds. Let them walk.

 

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No one is saying that you shouldn't help your daughters - as long as your input is, in fact, helpful. If you really want to coach, ask the Manager if you can help. If the answer is "no", there's probably a reason for that.

I think that we have to define "Helicoptering". That's when you are constantly giving advice through the fence while the game is in progress.

If you and your kids work in the back yard on mechanics, strategies, game situations, etc... that's fine. But from warm-ups through the final out, sit in the stands and offer encouragement - for the entire team.

"Let the coaches coach". If you're not good with that, then start your own team.

:cap:

 

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The reason why I said what I sai is because I've been there and done that. I'm trying to get my rotors clipped so to say. Anything I see, I pass onto the coach and let him make the decision whether or not to pass on.

I like your comparisons, but that's comparing apples-oranges. We are anywhere from 10-70 feet from our child with only parents support (maybe 20 per side) compared to a b-ball or f-ball game and as parents are 100+ plus screaming over a few hundred to a few thousand fans. There's no way a child on the sidelines can pick up his/her parents voice (unless you have a mouth like mine) :lmao:.

Well, I would disagree, I am not hovering around her, hanging out in the dugout, every time she runs back in.

Telling her to "fix it" is no different than a parent saying "protect here you have 2 on you" if telling her to "fix it", from the First base foul line behind the fence from a lawn chair is being a "helicopter parent" Then it would be safe to say that in every game, Football, basketball, etc, when I hear a father say... "come on guys, wrap him up", from the grandstands makes him a helicopter parent at a football game... How about the fans that watch football on TV, are they helicopter fans?

Really?

I would agree, on those that rush back to the dugout, after every inning, telling her what she did wrong, and what she did right... standing on the backstop yelling after each pitch... YEP... Without any doubt... but telling her to "Fix it" yeah not so much.

 

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I address this in my player/parent agreement. During games I don't want parents, siblings, or friends in the dugout. I tell my players to get anything you may need before the first pitch. If you think you need your mom or dad come to me or one of the other coaches and we can determine if it is really needed.

I think the main reason I prefer parents to stay away is my experience has been they tend to not come when their DD is successful but sprint to give "advice" when they have experienced a failure. In these situations we as coaches have already discussed the situation with the player and anything from mom/dad is just increasing the time the player needs to put the mistake behind them and move on.

I do however seek out parents, especailly those who I know have their DD working with a specialty coach, to get an opionion if they are seeing something I may be missing that could help their DD make a correction to something they are stuggling with.

 

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My parents were told up front when their girls received offers, that there is to be no interference during a game or practice. The fact and the matter of it is, the girls on the team, means how it is their team, will come to me when they feel a parent is interfering too much, and tell me I need to give the parents "the speech", that's what they call it.