This is so true. Im learning also that coaching boy i way different than girls. I just heard Mike Candrea say biggest thing he learned about coaching girls is "Guys need great plays to feel good, Girls need to feel good to make great plays"!
Coach Candrea has books and videos that cover almost every part of the game. I'd suggest checking out his library of information as well as going to the ASA website for suggested reading. Everyone on here has had to learn the game somehow and many have finally learned they can't coach girls the same as they may have coached boys in the past. Also, you'll find over time there IS a difference between baseball and fastpitch softball and you'll need to remember this to be good at coaching the game.
The other fact you have already touched on is the need to coach girls different than boys. I use the following analogy to explain the differences when giving a coaching clinic:
If you walk up on a group of young boys and pick one out, then instruct him to go run head on into a tree nearby, watch out for what will happen. Most young men will do what they are told, even if it's to show off for his buddies watching. The worst senario would mean you'd have to say "because I told you to" to insure he'll complete the task. Now walk up to a bunch of girls and point one out instructing her to run head first into a nearby tree. You'll almost always get a strange look followed by the question "why?" This in a nutshell is the difference between coaching boys and girls. Boys will react to a command, sometimes for the wrong reasons while a girl needs reason to react. If you explain the need to a girl on "why" she should run head on into a tree and it makes sense, she'll go run head on into a tree. One thing is for sure, she won't do it unless she understands "why." For this reason, I call all my clinics "Why" clinics because I take the time to explain the reasoning behind every facet of the game. Once a girl understands "why", she'll perform for you. Don't try to tell a girl to do it "because I said so" or you'll get the dreaded "stare." You don't want the "stare." That hollow look that has the gears turning behind their eyes while they try to determine if they can kill you and get away with murder. If you ever get the "stare", be sure to back up and retry your approach.
While I would be happy to help you in more detail if you'd like to im me for a more personal contact, I'd like to use this thread to point out something that has been a topic of debate by myself and one of my best friends in life. The subject has been the need to learn fastpitch and play the game at its earliest moment instead of playing slowpitch and converting at a later age. My friend has always campaigned that girls should play slowpitch until they become teenagers so they can develop the skills to field the ball and give them confidence at the plate to hit. I've always maintained the girls need to learn fastpitch in its entirety from the beginning because there is so much more to fastpitch and the girls need the reps. A young player needs to develop the quicker instincts needed to play this game and very few can make those adjustments with the flip of a coin. Repetition is key to girls learning and developing "game."
Coming from a community that finally converted their little league effort from slowpitch to fastpitch, I've watched the ladies make the transition and in many cases it wasn't pretty. My friend was a baseball dad and as many of us come to find out; having daughters can sometimes be construed as a cruel joke by the Almighty. Guys struggle to understand women. WOW! Yes, I said it for all to hear!
You are on the right track getting them started in our game. Step 2 will be to show no fear in being patient enough to help them make the transition. Make sure they know you're all in it together. Keep it fun, keep it light, and stay with the themes that have been shared by so many in your thread. It takes time for these kids to adjust but they will as long as they are having fun.
** but I'll bet he'll help you out anyway... He's that kind of guy!
