I was actually involved in a court case where we sued a 501(c)3 for this exact thing. Due to problems with the org, we left (not softball). At that point in time, we had fund raised $1250, all of which wa sitting in my DD account.
We owed no expenses of any sort and had receipts for several items that were reimbursable.
The court ruled that the org could indeed just keep the money and use it as they see fit. However, in our favor, they had reimbursed another parent that left the org $250. So the court said that they had set the precedent by going against their by-laws and they were required to forward our total balance to another non-profit of our choice.
The reason is that we were never told that the org could keep the money, and they had reimbursed another parent for a lesser amount.
With that said, at the end of the day, while in your heart you raise the money for your DD, in reality, you raise money for that organization. You either trust the board members to do the right thing, which would be to use the money to further the cause of the organization, or you dont trust them.
Sounds like it turned sour for you, but in the end, I beleive the org is right.
BTW, the org that we sued had taken that money and bought some other girls 5 year jackets, then had to pay us the money back.