When is it OK to miss a game/day?

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It should not be an issue for that one day and I would expect her to tell the coach and also expect to sit part of Sunday. It's a choice she will need to make. Life's full of them, all learning ones.....

Agreed! Missing one day is not a big deal - as long as they expect to sit upon returning and are aware that there are other girls on the team anxious for the opportunity being presented by the player who would like the time off.

I would imagine it also depends a lot on the type of team you are playing for. There are many teams formed so the girls can have a good time playing ball and hanging out with their friends, and their are teams who have higher expectations.

A Death in the family... of coarse they should be with their family. Softball should be the last thing on their mind!!! A Justin Beiber Concert?????? Well - That's not the kind of player I want on my team. I'd be hard pressed to think that player would be starting again for a while. Not when their are at least 9 other players on my team who would rather be playing softball.

I would also look at - Is this the kid who has a habit of missing practices too? That kind of player may prefer to play on the "good time hanging out with friends" style team.
 
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This is a hard one to give an opinion. I just typed out what I thought and then deleted it. There are a lot of issues here. First she is 12 let her be 12 sometimes. If she is a pitcher or catcher out of the two that you have, well that stinks. If she is a position player (all but catcher and pitcher) and you know several months prior, get someone else to fill the spot during practice, that way the player is able to play the position. In most case my players do know two to three positions; depending on who is pitching as to how the defense is set. What if your stud player gets hurt or sick, you need to replace them so why wait for that crisis. If they are a player who misses practice often and does not really care (why are they on the team) but if they are, that is one less player you have to think about putting in a rotation somewhere :) and more at bats for the other players. Happy New Year!
 
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Send the dd with the team and you take your wife out for her b-day, dont see how a parental b-day is a reason for a kid to miss a softball game? Am I missing something here?

RD, it's not, but tell that to DW. LOL. I think the fact that DW still thinks softball is a SUMMER sport has her a bit behind the 8ball and miffed when we drive 4hrs to a winter tourney and she gets to spend her B-day 8 hours in a car and another 10 hours sitting in a bag chair. Not all "Moms" are sold on how great fastpitch is. : )
 
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I think it literally depends on the dd. I have the tale of 2 worlds.

My oldest, if she played traver, believes that homecoming, prom, etc is important and softball isn't. I'd support her in her decision. I don't have to worry about the doghouse for those events :yahoo:. HOWEVER, if a Justin Beaver concert, all bets are off. Normally most coaches get the schedule out before that announcement when his coming to the area. However, I would contact the coach concerning the schedule, if by chance, the announcement for the concert is first.

My youngest on the other hand lives, breathes, and eats softball. All bets are off. I'm sacrificing to get her the lessons needed to help her achieve her dreams, she's going to sacrifice as well. That's what the "off-season" is for.

Your last sentence is actually why I would even consider allowing her to go. Our DDs already sacrifice their childhood away from their friends, family, youth groups, and anything else they value for 9-10 months a year. How can people think our DDs are not already sacrificing enough, if not TOO much for a game at these young ages.

The polling is interesting as it's clear that 50% support the idea of a DD knowing she wants to attend something else for a day, while the other 50% feel it would be breaking a commitment to the team.

I suspect that the polarity of the poll results might have something to do with the age group of the Parents responding. Wondering if younger age group parents are in the "You must play" while the older Age group parents have realized that their is life before, during, and after softball, and if you allow softball to RULE your life, you just might be going down the road to DD burnout, DW leaving you, Softball bankruptcy, ....... Could be wrong, but thinking the new parents/coaches might be a bit over zealous on the commitment focus to the point they might not be "hearing" their dds needs.

Keep the poll results coming. I think OFC has again provide great feedback. THANKS!
 
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If there is ample notice (e.g. 6 months in this case) that should not be an issue. Softball is not life, just part of it. I have seen way to many kids quit the game due to the all consuming nature it is taking on.

Now, if it is a last minute notification there is absolutely no excuse. JMHO
 
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I would not even know how to answer this question. Yes I do. NO to the concert. Yes to every thing dealing with dances and school. I would try and get the coach to not schedule a tourny that weekend if he/she could do it for the concert (prior to buying tickets) I would say at the younger age it would hurt more saying no. I would just hope she would make her own choices about commitment later in life that would help her understand once you make a commitment you need to do ever thing to honor it.
 
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We had 3 just go to the Justin Bieber concert and the teasing they endured from their teammates was punishment enough!!!! :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
 
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I would not even know how to answer this question. Yes I do. NO to the concert. Yes to every thing dealing with dances and school. I would try and get the coach to not schedule a tourny that weekend if he/she could do it for the concert (prior to buying tickets) I would say at the younger age it would hurt more saying no. I would just hope she would make her own choices about commitment later in life that would help her understand once you make a commitment you need to do ever thing to honor it.

I think the pollsters on this thread have spoken and by a 27 to 16 margin, stating that taking a day off for something that is important to the individual is NOT breaking a commitment within the context of that being an isolated happening in a 8-9-10 month season.
 
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This is a question I always had.... Why is it more important to have Mother's Day weekend off but the same respect is not paid during Father's Day weekend?

Sounds sexist to me :lmao:

Most dads I know would rather be watching their dd play on Father's Day. And winning would be the best Father's Day gift.
 
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Great thread. I have always wondered what the thoughts were on the subject. My DD has not been allowed to miss games OR practice except for illness or injury. I subscribe to the team thought. A team is not the same if even one person is missing. A LOT of practice goes into most teams, months of practice so it didn't seem right to me for a player to let her teammates down after they worked so hard, even if just for a game. Now this has worked for us the last 5 years but might get harder as she goes into 16u next year and then 18u. Guess we will have to loosen up but not for no Justen Bieberhead concert. :eek:
 
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That is a crazy rule. You should be able to miss practice anythime you want . Quit being a sheep !!!!!! ROTFLMAO
 
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First I would do everything I could to refuse letting her go to a Justin Beiber concert! If I lose the fight, I would insist we have a tourney near by it so she can run back and forth!! ;)
 
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I asked both my dd's on this subject, just to confirm what I thought. My oldest, between games/practices or Justin Beaver, Justin won. My youngest, games/practice won.
 
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I understand not burning them out, at the same time though, they commited to a travel ball team and that commitment affects the rest of the team. If they want to miss practices for lame reasons, they should not be playing travel ball, they should be in rec. There are realistic reasons to miss, ( injury, illness, family reasons, ect. ). The rest of the team is counting on everyones commitment. If you practice 2 or 3 times a week, and a girl misses a practice for what they consider a "once in a lifetime thing", then no big deal,( if it`s only once, and the coach is told in advance ), but if they are missing several practices and tourny games, thats different in my opinion. The rest of the team is counting on them to do thier part and by not being there, they are not doing it. When they commit, they commit to themselves, the coaches and thier teammates, if thats not what they want, then they need to rethink the decision they have made. Most practices and games have been scheduled in advance and the parents and girls know what it is and in most cases they can schedule normal events around it. I`m all for the kids being kids, I think they should live it up while they are young, ( before reality hits them when they go out in the real world.....lol), but they also need to understand commitment, it`s a good "life lesson" anyway. It`s all in what they want to do. I leave the decisions of commitment to my both my dd`s, I just tell them that when they do commit, they must stay commited for the duration. Sometimes, when something comes up, they want to skip, but I won`t let them, I just remind them that it was thier decision and if they regret it, they better think a little harder about it before the next commitment, but they always do it again lol. They love sports and understand that they are a part of a team and they love it. I`m proud of them for it to.
 
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Most dads I know would rather be watching their dd play on Father's Day. And winning would be the best Father's Day gift.

I agree.. but there is a HUGE amount of mothers that get ticked off if the girls play on Mother's Day weekend.

Could be why you see a lot of Saturday only events that weekend :)
 

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