My favorite line when they come in is lets go down stairs to the office BOY, as they enter I reach up on the shelf and pluck a jar full of formaldehyde (spelled wrong) with a piece of masking tape on it, and ask him his name, then I will write it on the tape. Then I replace it back on the shelf adjacent to 4 or 5 other jars containing sheep testacies and the 10 in. Buck Special hunting knife, with the names of boys who have left the school district with in the last year or two. "Man doe's that get their attention", then asking them to hold open their wallet can get them real nervous not enough money, too much money, lord forbid the circular indent in the wallet. And the all too rememberable line "I hope I won't have to do this again I will remind you this one time the way she leaves is the way she will be brought home understand?".
Once they leave the one great thing about the modern cell phone is that they have gps locaters to a lap top. If they are not where they should be, the sound of a hog running wide open and a leather clad pissed off father barreling down on the wide eyed terrified runt can leave puddles in their drivers seat, especially when that chain starts flying, or the stainless steel barrel of the trusty S&W 357 catches the moonlight in that charming way that only a father could truly appreciate.
As my dd is screaming and crying I don't know him, I repeat again "I was him 30 years ago, do I know him better than you".
Thank God my dates fathers weren't like me or I might have been a monk.