Some Things Change And We Never Seem To Learn

[CoachMike0308]

Over the last few years, I look at various chats and forums. One thing that makes me go "hmmm" is that parents today seem to be arguing about the same things parents argued about 20 years ago. I was inspired to write my blogs this week on the subject. I invite you to check them out, feel free to comment. If you want you can email me directly as well: coachmike@customlineupcards.com or coachmike@kidznsports.com.

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I know we all want the best for our kids... hope this helps ...

 

[Stedman00]

part of the problem is that the same things that caused problems then, are still happening now.

 

[CoachMike0308]

True. Also people tend to make mountains out of molehills. I always tried to let my daughter "fight her own battles" unless the battle was brought to my doorstep or if it was beyond her reach to solve the issue.

 

[Stedman00]

one of the biggest I keep seeing and reading about people really upset about, then and now.... is the daddy / mommy ball head coaching. to include the assistant coaches, who's DD always bat 1,2,3 etc in line up regardless of average, errors in field, etc.

 

[CoachMike0308]

Agreed but I would maybe address that just from the standpoint of player stats and positions. Especially at the younger ages, every coach is a mom or dad. We would not have youth sports without moms and dads. I actually interviewed a well known softball person on this subject and she had talked about how her mom and dad started the league in their area. There is favoritism many times. But there are also people who may wrongly label a coach as playing mommy or daddy ball when they are just upset that their child didn't get the attention. The opposite perspective is also valuable. Should I slight my daughter to try to reduce accusations of "daddy ball?" Would that not be unfair to her? It goes both ways.

 

[IRdad09]

Agreed but I would maybe address that just from the standpoint of player stats and positions. Especially at the younger ages, every coach is a mom or dad. We would not have youth sports without moms and dads. I actually interviewed a well known softball person on this subject and she had talked about how her mom and dad started the league in their area. There is favoritism many times. But there are also people who may wrongly label a coach as playing mommy or daddy ball when they are just upset that their child didn't get the attention. The opposite perspective is also valuable. Should I slight my daughter to try to reduce accusations of "daddy ball?" Would that not be unfair to her? It goes both ways.

Well said. Take parent coaches out of the equations and see how many teams there are, regardless of sport. Are they some poor parent coaches 100%, but I've met far more good ones than bad ones over the last 7yrs.

 

[CoachMike0308]

Well said. Take parent coaches out of the equations and see how many teams there are, regardless of sport. Are they some poor parent coaches 100%, but I've met far more good ones than bad ones over the last 7yrs.

Yes and another thing I don't think people often consider.... how did you do your first time? How many times have new coaches or umpires been treated really bad. I used to go to Coach's Clinics. The first high school I coached at paid for me to attend a big clinic that used to come to So Cal. I had been coaching for some time at lower levels. But I took advantage and learned a lot more. Every league should do some training clinics for coaches and parents. Bring in some local college or high school, and even travel ball coaches that have been doing it for a while to share their experiences. We say its for the kids... let's prove it.

 

[yocoach]

Yes and another thing I don't think people often consider.... how did you do your first time? How many times have new coaches or umpires been treated really bad. I used to go to Coach's Clinics. The first high school I coached at paid for me to attend a big clinic that used to come to So Cal. I had been coaching for some time at lower levels. But I took advantage and learned a lot more. Every league should do some training clinics for coaches and parents. Bring in some local college or high school, and even travel ball coaches that have been doing it for a while to share their experiences. We say its for the kids... let's prove it.

I completely agree with this. However, at least in my area, rec coaches usually fall into one of 3 categories. 1, Roughly 60% just don't care to learn more. 2, 25% are too busy to learn more and use that as an excuse or 3, 15% or less want to learn more and end up moving on to coach TB teams. There's nothing wrong with that in my opinion. Youth sports needs coaches at ALL levels. That said, I wish more wanted to learn at least how to teach solid fundamentals at the rec level.

 

[IRdad09]

I completely agree with this. However, at least in my area, rec coaches usually fall into one of 3 categories. 1, Roughly 60% just don't care to learn more. 2, 35% are too busy to learn more and use that as an excuse or 3, 15% or less want to learn more and end up moving on to coach TB teams. There's nothing wrong with that in my opinion. Youth sports needs coaches at ALL levels. That said, I wish more wanted to learn at least how to teach solid fundamentals at the rec level.

Agreed and I get to see both sides of this. Coaching a high level travel team and then my middle daughters Rec team in the summer. It amazes me year after year to see the same people coaching the same Rec teams doing the same things wrong over and over. From the statements they make, to the way they are showing the girls to do things is just plain wrong. I have to take a step back though and say I don't know what their background is and at the same time at least they volunteered their time to at least try and make a difference.

The girls they are coaching may not be learning a ton or even things the right way, but at least they are getting the chance to play the sport they have interest in.

 

[CoachMike0308]

I completely agree with this. However, at least in my area, rec coaches usually fall into one of 3 categories. 1, Roughly 60% just don't care to learn more. 2, 35% are too busy to learn more and use that as an excuse or 3, 15% or less want to learn more and end up moving on to coach TB teams. There's nothing wrong with that in my opinion. Youth sports needs coaches at ALL levels. That said, I wish more wanted to learn at least how to teach solid fundamentals at the rec level.

Absolutely. There is also a smaller group, probably in the 60% that think they don't need to learn more. Like you said, that's ok. I think at lower levels some people get too worked up about whether the coach is teaching the kids college level skill sets. Let the kids have some fun and part of it they will learn on their own without the coach telling them. 3 examples come to mind: Craig Counsel, Gary Sheffield, and Mark "the Bird" Fydrich. Are you going to tell me some coach before high school taught them to hit or pitch like they did?

 

[CoachMike0308]

Agreed and I get to see both sides of this. Coaching a high level travel team and then my middle daughters Rec team in the summer. It amazes me year after year to see the same people coaching the same Rec teams doing the same things wrong over and over. From the statements they make, to the way they are showing the girls to do things is just plain wrong. I have to take a step back though and say I don't know what their background is and at the same time at least they volunteered their time to at least try and make a difference.

The girls they are coaching may not be learning a ton or even things the right way, but at least they are getting the chance to play the sport they have interest in.

Yes. When I was coaching high school years ago, we would often lose some girls to track. Why? In track, EVERYONE gets to compete (read "play"). And from what I gather there's less drama in track lol. Another reason why soccer is gaining so much popularity.... everyone gets a chance to play at some point. It's funny to see some travel coaches that like to rule with an iron fist. They may have great teams, and great players. But how many do they lose because the girls aren't having any fun. "Oh but we're getting them ready for college." Really? Have you ever watched college softball teams? Some of those coaches are tough too but there are many times where those girls are having FUN.. There's a bigger picture that unfortunately many people miss on the way up.