To pierce or not to pierce. That is the question.

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My DD, who will be 14 in June has asked to get a small diamond nose piercing. Mrs. Ringer said noway. I am split. Is it such a taboo nowadays? Are we turning into our parents and are becoming out of touch with what kids see as ok today. I told her that she understands it has to taped, covered or removed for ball games. She understands that. She is a good kid and has never been in any trouble at school or anything. My thought is, is this really the battle I want draw a line in the sand for. It's not drugs, secks or alcohol. It seem benign enough to give her a little freedom and I can lay the hammer down on the real big issues. What say all of you. Don't hold back. I need honest opionions. I am too close the situation to see it from an outside unbiased perspective.

 

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our decision with our kids in the areas of tatoos and or piercings were ( with the exception of ears) wait till you are 18 -you are an adult something permanent like these, we didn't feel kids have a real grasp on- like how a 50yr old body is going to look with ...... our kids are 2 boys 31&23,2 girls 25&15 fyi thats just the way we did it whatever you decide it'll be ok in the grand scheme of things

 

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I can see what you are saying Ringer. When to fight the big battles.

Tats, I'm of the opinion of "out of the question young lady" syndrome.

Poked hole in the nose. I can't help but wonder if it heals ... if she decide it was a "fade or phase" she went through...LOL . it heals and closes. Not sure though. Somebody in the OFC will have an answer to that.. LOL

But, the little battles make sense when the big battle comes. The little battle here is to say yes.. really no harm if the hole is taken care properly while having it, etc... so yes you can have it.

Then the DD thinks "Dad is cool with it".. then a few more "cool Dad" moves along the way and then that day comes for the "Big Battle" and she looks at "Cool Dad" for support in a "decision".. and realizes "Cool Dad" not so "cool" with this idea of mine..... and you hope the DD gets the message for what is cool and what is "completely out of the question"

and.....

parents hope that respect rules the way when she realizes that Dad " must have a reason" for saying "completely out of the question" to her today.

 

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PS : Best wishes to you and the "grief" you might receive from your "significant other/better half" being "No" was her answer.

Maybe tell her that the "next" time you'll take the "hit" and bring the "
hammer down" on the DD in the next "bigger decision".

Cool Dads rule !!!

 

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i don't have an answer , can just add to the topic by asking "why is it that fastpitch girls want the nose pierced ?" it's seems like a strong fad for the 15-16-17-18u age groups. Personally I'll own up to hating the look . These girls need to remember that once upon a time (about 3-5 years ago) a beautiful inking across the lower back was the I GOT TO HAVE IT fad but is now referred to as a tramp stamp. At least the nose ring can be removed. tough call. nose and eyebrow piercings are just not attractive IMO.

 

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i wouldn't want to say yes then have the mrs. keep on me about it...lol...... pdad7

 

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I dont usually weigh in on these, but I had a thought on how I might handle it with my 14 year old. My daughter wants the top of her ear pierced. I have made her wait so far, plus given her a goal that she must reach in order to get it done. (softball related of course) This makes it not an impulse thing, plus they must accomplish a goal that we set together to get it done. If she really wants it that bad, she will show you that by accompishing the goal. Two things will happen, she will saty after it and get the goal, thus getting her pericing, or the desire will fade and it is a done issue. Still everyone remains happy and daughter learns something about how hard do you want to work for something in life! ( I also suggest it be a tall goal that they will have to work her hardest on to achieve)

 

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i don't have an answer , can just add to the topic by asking "why is it that fastpitch girls want the nose pierced ?" it's seems like a strong fad for the 15-16-17-18u age groups. Personally I'll own up to hating the look . These girls need to remember that once upon a time (about 3-5 years ago) a beautiful inking across the lower back was the I GOT TO HAVE IT fad but is now referred to as a tramp stamp. At least the nose ring can be removed. tough call. nose and eyebrow piercings are just not attractive IMO.

Pretty much this, for my feelings also.

I don't think that I would "lay down the law" about it, but I would not like it, at all. For me this stuff is a total turn off, I like the natural beauty of people, and I can get to understand that you are "different" by getting to "know" you .......... which is maybe an old fashioned and out dated method of differentiation, lol? JMHO.

My oldest son got a tattoo, with my blessing, although I strongly urged him not. It was the "Army Medic" symbol which has some deep commitment & emotions for him, at least it isn't ...... B-A-M-B-I or A-M-B-E-R ......

Good luck Ringor, it is indeed acceptable, but kids just need to think longer term before just "doing it" ....

 

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This comeing from a dad that has some tattoos. Man they looked great when i was 21 but now as i am just a few months away from 40 lets just say gravity is such a drag. We have to accept what kind of world we live in. People judge. I remember when i was a salesman when i was in my early 20s i let my hair grow longer than what would be considered proffesional. My boss told me you know your hair is never going to get you a sale but it could cost you one. Result i got a haircut next day because i had a family to support. So to answer the thread question i guess i fall into the not so cool dad arena. NO YOU MAY NOT GET YOUR NOSE PIERCED while living under my roof or as long as im paying your bills.

 

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i don't have an answer , can just add to the topic by asking "why is it that fastpitch girls want the nose pierced ?" it's seems like a strong fad for the 15-16-17-18u age groups. Personally I'll own up to hating the look . These girls need to remember that once upon a time (about 3-5 years ago) a beautiful inking across the lower back was the I GOT TO HAVE IT fad but is now referred to as a tramp stamp. At least the nose ring can be removed. tough call. nose and eyebrow piercings are just not attractive IMO.

It definitly has that aura about it... Id have to say wait till 18 if you want to look like that.

 

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Good luck Ringor, it is indeed acceptable, but kids just need to think longer term before just "doing it" ....
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I disagree with the "it is indeed acceptable" part of the quote. My wife hires young people on a regular basis. It is indeed something that is frowned on in the business world. Aren't we all inpressed when we see someone with a band-aid on their face?

 

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Don't be our parents. Let her have it. What the harm, really? Not like she wants a nose ring and a bunch rings on her lips. For a good kid and I am with your thought "It's not drugs, secks or alcohol. It seem benign enough to give her a little freedom and I can lay the hammer down on the real big issues."

My DD has the green light on a nose piercing or additional ear piercings or even a tattoo in an easily hidden spot but since she got the green light the subject hasn't come up again. They just want their boundaries to expand every now and then.

 

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I agree with this one I have done the same except went further....Tell her you will go with her an get the same!

 

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I say noway ,, not until they are 18, and i will still try too talk they out of it,lol

 

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Looks "Trampy" to me, along with the tattoos some of these girls get. I don't mind tattos at all (love to watch Miami and LA Ink) provided they have meaning and a purpose.

DD has been on me about getting a tattoo, but it hasn't happened yet. When she turns 18 I hope we have raised her the right way and she can make an informed decision on her own. FWIW

 

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I say if you as a parent trust your kid enough to be responsible for it then let her do it. I do not have any problem with it, I have seen plenty of teenagers with them, no big deal to me. I have always tried to trust my own kids in there decisions when they were growing up. IMHO if you try to control every little thing they do they rebell more and will do it behind you back. Trust between parents and kids is the most important part of there relationship....I would have let my DD at 14 do it if she wanted too, but she never asked....but now she is in college who knows what she has pierced...

 

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I have to say... let her do it. A nose ring hole is almost impossible to see when the stud isn't in there. It's one of the easiest healing, most socially acceptable "alternative" piercings. Also one of the cheapest...lol. I have one. I love mine. I would allow my DD to get one at 14 if she asked. My 16yo son has said for years that he wants a tattoo. We told him once he turned 16, if he still really wanted it, we would take him. He's been 16 since December and said he is still trying to figure out what he wants because he wants it to have a personal meaning to him.

I figure, as long as my kids aren't into drugs, drinking, they get good grades, and are pretty good kids.... then it isn't a problem. If a piercing or tattoo is the biggest issue with my kids, then I'm doing pretty darn good. This isn't a hill I'm willing to die on.

If she does get it, make sure it's at the end of her season so it has plenty of time to heal. She's not going to want to wear it during play. Those things hurt like a b!&ch when pushed into the inside center of the nose..... trust me! Also, you can get clear acrylic "plugs" for them for when you have to "hide" them.

Good luck to you!

 

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As a parent with tatoos I say let her have it. It sure beats the other "stuff" she may choose to express herself with, especially if she really wants it and she can't have it she may rebel with other things more extreme. JMO but feel it hurts nothing. The world has changed folks, face it or you will fall behind.

 

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one of the grossest things i have ever seen--girl i worked with had nose peirce, she sneezed and the thing came out and flew across the table. gross..

 

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I think Mrs. Ringer and DD should BOTH go together and get "matching" nose rings:yahoo: