My advice is to attend these massive recruit camps at an early age (Freshman year, etc.) It exposes your daughter to the environment of pitching alongside other players, and also with coaches eyes on you. The older they get, the more selective the camps should be (Winter camps at target schools) or summer combines right before tournaments (Stingrays, Pennsbury, Legacy, etc) My DD attended the KSU camp as a Sophomore and did not get one email, she also did not stand out among the 80 pitchers there. Sure she might have been a few mph faster than the next girl, but she realized that a few was not enough. Reality checks come in many ways and for DD it was fortunately early enough for her.
...and butchy, thanks for being honest about your experience, and I'm glad you learned as a parent from your experience as well. Choose wisely.