The Bus Ride Home

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Okay,..so you lost the game. Big game or not, League game or not. So what's the quiet sullen ride home accomplish. NOBODY LIKES TO WIN MORE THAN ME,...NOBODY!!!!!!! Does this somehow keep the HR from going over the fence. Does this somehow put the ball safely in the glove of an outfielder. Does this somehow take back the 3rd strike looking for a batter that ended the game. EVERY team prepares the best way they know how for every game. Every player plays the best they can,...do you think they make mistakes on purpose? Every game played produces a winner and a loser. MOVE ON !! Oh, by the way, who polices the HOME games? Are you suppose to drive home in your car quietly, and if you live close, do you have sit quitly for another 20 minutes until a Senior calls and says it's okay to speak.

Practice Hard, Play Hard, Accept the results, Start again tomorrow..........

 

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AMEN!!

 

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True-True Thunder-Road. I've heard of JV teams not being permitted to celebrate their wins when their Varsity team loses, they too must sit in silence and reflect in the loss. I guess that these players are suppose to reflect in their shame (spoken sarcasticly). Get over it and learn from it.

 

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depending on the loss and what transpired, normally the quiet bus ride home is supposed to be instrospective for the player (and probably the coaches as well), and while mistakes cannot be corrected during yoga or a feverish lament along a twisted Ohio road, it may allow some of those players to rehash certain aspects (ie, made a bad play, struckout with bases loaded, i cant believe such-n-such is on the team because she made 3 errors, etc, etc) of the game to better prepare themselves for the next challenge.

and yes, all ballplayers have the luxury of beginning anew the next day, or to be able to "make it up" during the next game in a few days. Think about football players, those fellas stew for one week in sweat, coaches yelling, and thier own hostility, no wonder they wear pads..I digress...

at least softball players have another chance later that Saturday, later that week...so to a coach, that silent ride home is to prove (probably) that the girls are taking it serious, "it" being the game, because most losses can be chalked up to missplays, missed oppurtunities (2-out hit, moving the runner, etc) and mistakes. And while i do know that some games are those marathon 12-inning 2-1 affairs that is won on a passed ball (or one of those, that-team-is-just-better-than-us 21-0 spankings), i think the coaches want to relay the fact that they are there to win and improve skills. When that doesn't happen, why should the bus be full of cheer and disco lights?

my dd plays in 7th, and if anything, the silence makes them madder (normally against a few culprits who couldn't catch a ball in the outfield).

as for the ride home, I'm sure there are a lot of DD's dads that turn down the radio to say," what were you thinking?" or "what were you swinging at?" routines. How do I know? because I do that routine, and 2, there's always one of those chain mail letters about parents behavior after a loss that gets passed from team to team. They wouldn't make those if some parents werent going ballistic.

as for me, we always try to compliment, than say what needed to be improved. NO dogging out other players, and then it's dinner time.

hang in there thunder_road, it sounds like you love the game, so no manner of silence before or after a game will deter you from acheiving your goal. that silence-in-the-bus mind game is old school at its best. Hopefully that helped

 

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I've lived this. Try to explain to DD that "There is no I in Team".

 

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dad03, besides pick off moves and slap hitting, the complaining of a 14-yr old girl is by far the worst aspect of the game. It's something she is getting better at (but really came back after playing school ball, this being her second year playing travel)

 

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This in no way was written through my daughter's comments. This is being expressed by me and my experinces. AS a player forever ago and as a coach now. The postgame talk covers all what you have said and more. My daughter's coach is articulate and introspective. However the tone of the silence is demanded by a few players and then lifted at their will whether it was their poor play or someone else's. Yes, this has been going on forever, it's relatively comical if one believes the these few minutes will change the spots of the leopard.

 

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Thunder, I am one of those people that get mad after a loss. Ask my wife and kids, when the Yankees lose I leave the room for a 1/2 hour. When it comes to my DD and you know her, I have taken a different approach. Now that she is a freshman, she is a little easier (very little) to talk to. Therefore, when we are riding home in the car after either a home game or road game, we have what we call the game breakdown. This is after a win or a loss. Because win or lose you can always learn something about yourself.

Game Breakdown goes like this.

Defense - Highs - Good plays, positioning, thought process in a certain situation.

Defense - Lows - Bad plays, positioning, thought process during a certain play.

Defense - Things to work on.

Offense - Highs - Hits, base running, thought process

Offense - Lows - strikeouts, base running, thought process. What type of pitches?

Offense - Things to work on.

Team - Were you supportive? Did you demonstrate positive attitude?

This allows my dd to articulate her thoughts and frustrations.

Then I always end it with the following.

Did you give 100% today? If so, continue to work on the things you need to work on. and always strive for 100%. If not, than you know what the problem is. I am very proud of you and I LOVE YOU!

There is no sense of beating the kid down, they know if they played well or not. We as parents can only help them get better, they have to want it.

 

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Thunder, I am one of those people that get mad after a loss. ?Ask my wife and kids, when the Yankees lose I leave the room for a 1/2 hour. .......

You haven't spent much time in your room this year have you. ;D ;D

 

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it does sometimes seem rather arbitrary, but the senior rules mentality has been established way before the slowpitch originated into fast. Plus, I guess, it looks bad when your team gets their lunch handed to them, then only to ride home on a cloud of air like nothing has happened. I can see both sides of the issue here

 

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heat29, I'm borrowing your template after the next game!

 

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Ringer - That's a good one. Just remember, you don't win championships in the months that start with A and M. Come talk to me in October.


Delcruz - I think your dd will like it as well.

 

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I suppose the silent bus ride home after a loss has been around for about as long as you have had sports and busses. For those times when teams travel together, whether it be varsity and JV, or softball and baseball, it is unfortunate when only one team wins. Having a couple of DD's, I would make this observation. After a loss my girls run the gamut from quietly introspective, to the game is over coaches talked pointed out mistakes in the post game meeting time to move on, to I won't feel better until I rant a little. Just within my family that is the mix, if you ever put them on the same team it would be something of a comedy act until they all settled down. Each action has its good and bad points, however, the SAFEST from a team perspective is when there is not a lot of talking after a loss.

 

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How to be a Fast Pitch Parent

It is probably the toughest job on the field. It is hard to do well, and seldom does anyone applaud you when you do it right. But to the team?and to your player?your job is exceptionally important. The responsibility is enormous. Do your best to be a good representative of your team?and your daughter's #1 supporter:


1. Softball is a SPORT - Kids are supposed to have FUN playing softball.

2. Your daughter might not be as good of an athlete as you were
when you were in school. Don't force her to be something she isn't.

3. If you weren't a good athlete in school, it is not your daughter's job to
make up for what you didn't do.

4. She knows when she makes mistakes. Catch her doing something right.

5. Teach, but only teach when you know the right things.

6. BE PATIENT! If you are the parent of a pitcher there are many body "mechanics"
she needs to master before she can start throwing hard. THEN, she
has to master both mechanics AND speed before she should start working on
accuracy. Be patient!

7. Umpires do their best and ARE trying to be fair. If you disagree with an
umpire's call, try to keep it to yourself. Your daughter doesn't need to think that
the problems she might be experiencing can be blamed on the umpire.

8. Not all good parents make good softball coaches.

9. Not all good coaches make good softball parents.

10. Again, softball is a SPORT. Let your daughter have the privilege of:
(1) doing it on her own, (2) doing her best, and (3) having FUN doing it.
Win or lose, your objective is to make her feel good about herself and make sure
she is smiling at the end of the game.

 

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catchersmom2,....There was a lot that was said on that bus, much of it probably overdue. That coach IS THE BEST COACH IN NWO or maybe anywhere. 24 years coaching varsity girls, 2 state championships with different schools, he's articulate and compassionate. I have followed this program for 10 years primarily due to this coach, AND yes I have "HOMER" tendencies. I can assure you, amongst his players, he is liked and respected. No he's not perfect, and I'm sure not All his players over 24 years agree with his decisions, but nobody can say he doesn't treat his players with respect and afford them every possibility of success.

............they were singing when they reached the A.W. parking lot,...it may have taken all that time to get to that point,...but they were singing!

 

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lol, she makes alot of assumptions Thunder. For all she knows coach was making end of the season BBQ plans ;D

 

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hehe, i wonder who'se in charge of bringing brats

 

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Heat29,
A bit off the subject but I bet you have not spent much time in the room thus far this season lol! Go Tigers!!!

 

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Hey epthunter, You are correct has been a rough season so far, but as history has shown my team will more than likely be there in Oct. The Tigers on the other hand, well we will have to wait an see. They are not having the same season as last year. As I said in an earlier post. You don't win championships in the months that start with A and M.

 

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the best way to do better next time is not sit quiet so that you negatively think about every bad play and possibility in that game, its to go ah that stinks ya know, be upset for a lil while and then move and go, well change this for next game! my team lost 3 league games by one run and on the wya home we were like god it was so close but man we fought hard, there is always next time. then we talked and were happy the whole way home. if i compare to our basketball season we were not allowed to talk not allowed on phones, and after losses the bus rides were miserable everybody mad, the season was not fun.