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This was written by Hal Skinner. I drug it over here from another site.
'BUCKET DAD' SYNDROME ? 1999,2001
You are the parent of a young pitcher. Whether you are the Mom or the Dad you are the one with the flat round behind that looks just like the lid of a five gallon bucket.
You are a "Bucket Dad" or maybe even a "Bucket Mom".
At some point in your young pitcher's career you will face the same problem as what surely must be the majority of young pitcher's parents out there have to face.
All of a sudden, for seemingly no reason at all, your kid will not want to work on their pitching with you anymore.
They will throw their heart out for their professional pitching coach and work hard at their team practices throwing to the other coaches or catchers. However, when it's the middle of the week and time for you to break out that bucket and glove, all of a sudden they don't want to and they make it very obvious they don't want to.
You might look at it as a rebellion and deal with it as such. You pretty much drag them to the park and force them to throw whether they want to or not. That can get very unpleasant.
You sit in your easy chair at night and try to figure out how this sweet kid of yours could just abandon you when it comes to her pitching effort. After all you did to get her started, those hundreds of hours trying to hatch that bucket. Rearranging your schedule to get her to the pitching instructor and all the money you spent. She doesn't appreciate one little bit of it.
Being tossed aside like last year's batting glove can break your heart, if you don't know it's coming. At some point, this WILL happen, to some varied extent.
This is the "Bucket Dad" syndrome and it is seldom recognized in the initial stages. I have seen it drive some pretty big wedges between a parent and a their young pitcher.
Let's look at it from a different perspective.
Do you remember when your young pitcher was real little? Remember when you got her that very first bicycle? Remember those training wheels you put on it? When she was real little she loved the bike and did not mind the training wheels at all. She knew that those training wheels provided support, a sense of
security and without them, she would fall flat on her face in her efforts.
As soon as she got a little experience under her belt, she wanted those training wheels off. She wanted to prove to you, herself and everyone else watching that she did not need them anymore. She graduated up to riding without her training wheels, just like the big kids do. When you took them off and she tried it for the first time without them, you still ran along beside her with your arms out, just in case. This was a very huge step for her, for you too, that's why you broke out the camera.
Well, guess what? As far as her pitching career goes, you are her training wheels. You got her started. You gave her confidence and a sense of security. You were there to make sure she didn't fall flat on her face in her efforts. Now, she wants to graduate up to pitching without the training wheels.
You probably were not comfortable with the idea of her riding that bike with no training wheels. You probably thought she wasn't ready yet and you were worried she might fall flat on her face. When it comes to her pitching, she is ready to prove to you, herself and everyone watching that she can do it, all by herself, without those training wheels. She is ready to take that step up, whether you are ready or not.
She has a pitching coach. In her mind that coach is the highest authority of anything having to do with her pitching. Any coaching input offered from anyone else is coming from a lesser source and will be treated as such, even if it is from coach Dad.
She still needs to throw between sessions and you are her catcher. So, fill the role that is needed. Be her catcher but don't be her coach when she is throwing to you while you are sitting on that bucket. Your help is far more likely to be accepted when you approach it as her catcher and not her coach.
When something doesn't go quite right, don't tell her what to do to fix it, ask her what to do. Ask her what just happened, what went wrong. Make her think.
Make her make the decisions and let her be her own pitching coach. Let her be the authority and put her knowledge to the test just like she is testing her physical ability.
If she runs into something she can't figure out she will turn to you for an opinion and when she does, give it to her. Don't tell her what to do, let the decision be hers but make the right suggestions.
Many parents can never reach the point that they stop trying to run alongside their kids to catch them if they should fall. You can hear them doing it from on top of buckets, from the dugouts, from the sidelines and you can hear them doing it from the stands too.
Understand and watch for the "Bucket Dad" syndrome. It can sometimes disguise itself and even infect kids playing other sports besides softball.
'BUCKET DAD' SYNDROME ? 1999,2001
You are the parent of a young pitcher. Whether you are the Mom or the Dad you are the one with the flat round behind that looks just like the lid of a five gallon bucket.
You are a "Bucket Dad" or maybe even a "Bucket Mom".
At some point in your young pitcher's career you will face the same problem as what surely must be the majority of young pitcher's parents out there have to face.
All of a sudden, for seemingly no reason at all, your kid will not want to work on their pitching with you anymore.
They will throw their heart out for their professional pitching coach and work hard at their team practices throwing to the other coaches or catchers. However, when it's the middle of the week and time for you to break out that bucket and glove, all of a sudden they don't want to and they make it very obvious they don't want to.
You might look at it as a rebellion and deal with it as such. You pretty much drag them to the park and force them to throw whether they want to or not. That can get very unpleasant.
You sit in your easy chair at night and try to figure out how this sweet kid of yours could just abandon you when it comes to her pitching effort. After all you did to get her started, those hundreds of hours trying to hatch that bucket. Rearranging your schedule to get her to the pitching instructor and all the money you spent. She doesn't appreciate one little bit of it.
Being tossed aside like last year's batting glove can break your heart, if you don't know it's coming. At some point, this WILL happen, to some varied extent.
This is the "Bucket Dad" syndrome and it is seldom recognized in the initial stages. I have seen it drive some pretty big wedges between a parent and a their young pitcher.
Let's look at it from a different perspective.
Do you remember when your young pitcher was real little? Remember when you got her that very first bicycle? Remember those training wheels you put on it? When she was real little she loved the bike and did not mind the training wheels at all. She knew that those training wheels provided support, a sense of
security and without them, she would fall flat on her face in her efforts.
As soon as she got a little experience under her belt, she wanted those training wheels off. She wanted to prove to you, herself and everyone else watching that she did not need them anymore. She graduated up to riding without her training wheels, just like the big kids do. When you took them off and she tried it for the first time without them, you still ran along beside her with your arms out, just in case. This was a very huge step for her, for you too, that's why you broke out the camera.
Well, guess what? As far as her pitching career goes, you are her training wheels. You got her started. You gave her confidence and a sense of security. You were there to make sure she didn't fall flat on her face in her efforts. Now, she wants to graduate up to pitching without the training wheels.
You probably were not comfortable with the idea of her riding that bike with no training wheels. You probably thought she wasn't ready yet and you were worried she might fall flat on her face. When it comes to her pitching, she is ready to prove to you, herself and everyone watching that she can do it, all by herself, without those training wheels. She is ready to take that step up, whether you are ready or not.
She has a pitching coach. In her mind that coach is the highest authority of anything having to do with her pitching. Any coaching input offered from anyone else is coming from a lesser source and will be treated as such, even if it is from coach Dad.
She still needs to throw between sessions and you are her catcher. So, fill the role that is needed. Be her catcher but don't be her coach when she is throwing to you while you are sitting on that bucket. Your help is far more likely to be accepted when you approach it as her catcher and not her coach.
When something doesn't go quite right, don't tell her what to do to fix it, ask her what to do. Ask her what just happened, what went wrong. Make her think.
Make her make the decisions and let her be her own pitching coach. Let her be the authority and put her knowledge to the test just like she is testing her physical ability.
If she runs into something she can't figure out she will turn to you for an opinion and when she does, give it to her. Don't tell her what to do, let the decision be hers but make the right suggestions.
Many parents can never reach the point that they stop trying to run alongside their kids to catch them if they should fall. You can hear them doing it from on top of buckets, from the dugouts, from the sidelines and you can hear them doing it from the stands too.
Understand and watch for the "Bucket Dad" syndrome. It can sometimes disguise itself and even infect kids playing other sports besides softball.
