DD's new coach laid it out best I've heard at the Parent Meeting this weekend when discussing"Parent Expectations":
(paraphrased) ..."you are to be a fan and encourage your DD. That is it....I promise you, your DD's are getting very good instruction from our coaching staff, and you should not be coaching them before, during or after the games or trying to correct things at home that go against what we are teaching them, because the reality is, most of what you will tell them is wrong, and makes it harder on you DD to learn...The quickest way for your DD to be pulled from the game is for you to coach her from the stands. Doesn't matter if it's bottom 7th, 2 outs, 0-2, if I instruct them on something, and they look at me and then to you in the stands it'll be 'Time, Blue...You, out. Someone else will finish this at bat'...Don't ask about playing time. That is between your DD and me. Because it will probably go something like this 'you:Why isn't my DD playing more?, me:Because I am putting the best team on the field that gives us a chance to win'...No discussions about any player other than your DD. Period...if they make any mistakes they are being coached, it's not your job to remind them after the game or question what happened, that is my job, and it will have already been addressed before you even see them. You just need to encourage them, and be their biggest fan, be Ump Friendly, Other Team Friendly and Other Team Fan Friendly....If there is any yelling, questioning of calls or rules that needs to take place, it is my place to do it, not yours. If it is ever an issue, we will talk about it directly after the game".
Happy, drama-free parents already 'get this', and make the best fans and supporters, but others need to be coached on how to be good sports parents, which is not a bad thing. Everyone learns.....so, if you're seeing drama and politics before your DD has even played her first HS game, you may want to consider yourself first....for your DD's sake, not yours.