Crying...really?!?

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My DD is an '00 playing on a 12U team, this being her third year in tournament ball. This year there has been more stomping, jumping up and down, flailing of the arms, hissy fit, storming out of the dugout, and just plain old crying on the bench (3 main offenders all whom are coaches kids). I think I need to buy a box of Kleenex for the dugout and I'm sick to death of it! I can count on one hand the number of times my DD has cried during a game in 5 years. We tell her to "Shake it off. Cry on your own time, not your teams time." A little harsh...maybe. Crying brings the whole team down. So my question is: Is this just an age thing (hormones) that a lot of teams go through? And before you trash the coach, they have threatened to bench players and are trying to handle it.
 
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A certain amount of drama is totally an age-related thing. Unfortunately, one soggy tissue spoils the whole box. If you know who the leading soggy tissues are, a little voice is saying they are likely staying so time to look for a new team. Good life lesson for the DD: learn how to acknowledge the feelings and manage the resulting behaviors.
 
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Is it passion for the game, feelings of letting team down, lack of confidence, or based on individual performance or lack their of? Agree it does affect the entire team - but so agree with Blue Ice - I benched and made an example of player to point she apologized to team the next day. By example I mean nothing over the top embarrassing - but made it clear certain types of behavior are not OK on the field. Player loves the game more than anything - and has improved 200% from last year. But - it makes it hard on teammates, coaches and parents when this happens. I spoke with player, explained the situation and we are working or ways to handle the situation better next time around. Chalk it up to growing up, life lesson and something to learn and build upon. But it must be addressed and handle at that moment - explained you are hurting team when you have to be benched during a game for behavior and that is unacceptable...
 
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Crying during a child's softball game? REALLY??? Maybe these kids should save it for when they're working a JOB and the pressure is on!!
 
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People cry for a number of reasons.

Is it hurt feelings? Physical pain? Embarrassment? Spoiled Kid? Or simply crying because they didn't win? (Which I never understood - who told you that you would never lose a game?)

Plus, some people just have eager tear ducts. I can be watching a movie with my wife and daughter, look over at them and see wet cheeks, and wonder what I missed...

I wouldn't worry too much about it at 12U.
 
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.This year there has been more stomping, jumping up and down, flailing of the arms, hissy fit, storming out of the dugout, and just plain old crying on the bench (3 main offenders all whom are coaches kids)..

I would agree with Lou if it was an isolated incident but doesn't sound like it...
 
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This is not easy to judge from a post on a fourm. Don't forget that many of the 12U players are going through some very difficult changes to their body and are trying to learn how to deal with becoming a woman while at the same time trying to play a competitive sport at a high level. Emotions are a mess. I agree this should not be ignored and must be addressed but tact is a must.
 
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I know this about crying, it is not part of the game or allowed on the field.

My wife played and coaches and she has a zero crying policy. When our middle DD was playing 10U (she was 8 at the time) she got drilled in the side by a pitch and started walking to 1st and crying. My wife walked up to her and said she had 2 choices. Stop crying and get on first, keep crying and go sit on the bench. The water works stopped right then and there.

I get that crying can be an emotional response. But controlling ones emotions and being able to focus in on the task at hand is a huge part of any athlete. So the sooner they learn that the better they will be.

All female coaches I know have a zero crying policy. Some are a bit over the top on the subject to be honest. It is us males who wonder how we can deal with it. I say we don't deal with it. There is no crying in softball.

Injuries are a completely different discussion. I am only talking about the crying because I am emotional stuff. My oldest DD still has problems controlling her emotions but she has learned that if it results in water works she is riding pine so she has been forced to temper her highs and lows. (she cried when she hit one over the fence the first time in HS)
 
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Thanks for the feedback everyone. I think it's probably a good combo of everything mentioned. I wasn't sure if perhaps I was being too judgmental. It just really seemed excessive this year to the point of predictability. I didn't see this much with other teams so I was just curious.
 
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This may need a thread of its own.

A few weeks ago I saw something that I have never seen before. Our team was in the finals of a tournament. Long weekend for everyone, it was when the monsoon hit. It was Sunday evening, everyone was ready to go home. We were winning. Big. The other team pulled their pitcher, she was upset, threw a little fit, no big deal really. I looked over in the other dug out, 2 coaches were nose to nose ready to fight. I couldn't hear what was being said but I was expecting them to start swatting at each other. Another coach got in between them and nothing happened. I was happy. That would have been an ugly scene.

Does this happen often? Anyone ever seen it?
 
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