curious how coaches handle this...

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One of your players is involved in high school sport during the winter. She practices 6 days a week. Most practices M-F are in the 5:30-7:30 time slot with a few in the 7:30-9:30 time slot. There are either games or practice on saturdays. You have practice on Sunday. Do you expect that girl to be at every practice, when she can make it or other.

I will say that my dd coach is understanding that every girl may not make every practice during the winter due to family conflicts, school sports or other.

As a father, I would like my dd to make every practice but is that fair on my part. When does she have time to be a teenager? When does she have time to just re*** and do nothing? I don't push her to practice during basketball season because I do realize that when you are tired and stressed out others seem to suffer. When you are not at your best physically injuries seem to happen, also.

As my title says I am curious on how other coaches deal with this especially at the high school level.

Do you as a coach hold it against the girl for not coming to practice?

I understand about building team unity and togetherness but can that be done in another way besides practice all the time.

Once again let me repeat. My dd coach has set the priorities for the team and has a understanding where everything falls in life. To that we appreciate her.

 

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We are dealing with the same thing now. I tell my girls that I understand they have a school committment but when not at a school activity, they need to be at practice. I can't expect them to lose their opportunity to play high school ball so they can make their summer teams practices in the off-season. I am sure the "elite" teams are more strict on the practice attendance (which is why they are elite). I don't think we as coaches can expect 14 year old girls to drop everything else in their lives to play softball, that is just unrealistic. I would LOVE it, but it isn't going to happen!! I think if you don't bend and be flexible, you will lose some players.

 

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We are also dealing with this. We are a 14u team that has 3 ninth graders. Two of the girls play high school basketball. We are playing in the saturday spano league. High school basketball is played on saturdays. There's not much you can do other than tell the girls if they can make the games please try to come. Playing both in a day is a lot so we are just playing with the girls that we have. Can't hold it against them. Luckly you only need eight to play. Just have to get the girls you have ready to play next summer. I totally agree with Thunder. If I put my foot down hard I probably can't field a team next summer. The dedication the elite teams have with their girls and parents is not easy to find.

 

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With our 14U teams off-season workouts are considered voluntary. Off-season practices you are expected to attend unless you have a prior school or family committment - (or need the extra time for schoolwork, of course that comes first!).

 

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During high school basketball season, it is unrealistic to expect a member of the girl's basketball team to attend every winter softball practice. During the summer, it is unrealistic for the high school basketball coach to expect a travel softball girl to attend every summer basketball practice. It's called the "off season" for a reason.

A different perspective: If a coach feels the need to make winter practices mandatory, he must not have a lot of confidence in his players bettering themselves on their own - and that's NOT a slam at the coach. If you have to force your kids to do something, they must not have their heart in it all that much. The dedicated players will show up anyway, and the others (not counting the b-ballers) will find an excuse not to. That's not saying you never have to occasionally "push" your kids to do something, because that's just teenage human nature.

There are a few of the "elite" teams that have very few team practices over the winter. Regardless, you are expected to show up prepared come summer. IMO, that's a testament to how committed those players (and parents) are. They are dedicated enough to work on their own over the winter without "hand holding". The message of dedication gets handed down from the parent. If the parent doesn't make skill improvement a priority, neither will the softball player. That's why you see parents reading newspapers at a rec. softball game while their kid is batting.

 

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I agree with Sammy. What an Elite team president told me. They don't have many winter practices, because they know the good players are working with hitting and pitching coaches and attending camps and clinics all winter. I can tell you from following his advice this approach works , my dd has learned more than she did from going to a practice that had the girls hitting off a batting machine with no instructions.

 

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This is why we don't do much over the winter months. On our softball travel team, we have basketball players, swimmers. They would get nothing out of 4 or 5 girls coming while the rest are at their high school sport. I leave the option there for the 4 or 5 to get a hold of me and we can work on things or they can lift or work out on there own. I honestly don't know how much a girl gets out of hitting one day a week over the winter or better in that amount of time.

As the poster said, kids need time to be kids and to have a little fun.

I think this is why so many kids get burnt out.

 

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Sidney,
You are so right. We know bunches of girls who quit playing a sport beginning in college because they didn't want to play any more. Most girls know what they need to do to be ready for the summer.

Also, one of the things we have found is that high school softball can be worse than winter sports in preparing a player for the summer. Once season begins, usually conditioning and weight lifting stops.

 

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We try to offer an infrastructure during the winter; that is, we make ourselves available to coach indoor play, hitting leagues, etc. If, as this year, not enough team members wish to participate in those activities, that's perfectly acceptable. I think that much of what we would like our girls to develop for softball involves the mental side of the game, and active competition in basketball, volleyball, or ****** helps. These sports also offer a conditioning that frankly we don't achieve during the summer.

 

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Nobody achieves it because all the other associations play 1:10 time limit games....lol.. or :50 minute... base a win or loss on how many got on third, or second, or first, or how many struck out ..... lol... Just kidding.

 

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Coaches should first:

Ask their players what they'll be doing over the winter months and then try to determine if winter practices will be practical. One of my daughters has a coach who sets his winter practice schedule without a moment of consultation with the players or their parents. I think he just checks his OWN daughter's schedule and sets the dates and times. Anyway, I actually think it's unfair to the coaches of their basketball or swimming or whatever teams (and their teammates) to have them risk an injury practicing softball out of season. I think the "burn out" factor is very, very real for young teens and that softball coaches should understand it and give the girls a chance to play other sports and to be kids. Playing a fall schedule is bad enough-- then they want to practice in December, play indoor games in January, February and March, practice in April and then play tournaments every weekend until school starts again. Enough already.

 

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Totally agree dolara7, The winter indoor games seem to be overkill. I think the girls need some time to heal the wounds and clear there minds, at least for the 16U - 18U level. There is an increase in homework, perhap's a job's or other High School activities or HS sport's, and not to mention a Boyfriend. Having batting practice once a week and throwing the ball around a gym is one thing. You need to step away for awhile and miss it to truly appreciate it, or have a hunger for it. Some coaches and parents have nothing else but softball in their lives, and have a need to keep going to make themselves feel good. I am sure we all experienced withdrawl's ( including our DD's ) from fastpitch at one point or another when the tournament season end's.

 

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At Classics Central -16u, we offer about 2-3 team practices a month from september to march. We play in 2-3 fall tournies and 2-3 indoor tournies. Pitchers get a once a week opportunity to pitch with me, and some hit with me (becaused they asked too) over and above practices. I make it VERY CLEAR to them that church, family, homework and school sports all come before Classics time. The college bound athlete needs to be able to balance school, faith, athletics and social life. These are choices they will make as they grow. Attendance at my off season practices doesn't effect playing time - they have already made the team.

 

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Gotta agree, I know there are kids that look at our team and turn away from it because we don't do much over the winter. Like a previous poster just stated, they need that time to recharge their batteries and unwind, and to miss it. It was funny yesterday, we had a our picture take for the local paper for a fundraiser we did and one of the girls who just finished up golf, and is going into swimming said, "I can't wait till summer!, its going to be so much fun, I had a blast this summer!"

It certainly put a smile on my face as this girl was woohed by bigger organizations but chose to come with us, because I told her I respected and admired that she played other sports, and I would be her biggest fan at them, and I have been.

I don't know about others, but I have enough to do now already, trying to put player profile dvd's together, and putting together a competitive summer schedule, and contacting college coaches. I also coach high school ball and that will be here soon enough.

 

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Some very thoughtful points are being made,..it's nice to see. The last couple of seasons I've coached the high school aged girls. These girls are winding down on the last couple of years of the truly youthful time in their lives. I am one of the fortunate coaches. All my players, for the Summer, are vital parts of their successful high school programs. These girls do alot on their own to work on their game while balancing family, school, jobs, and whatever else they need to be able to have the freedom to do. If I attempt to wear them out in November and December, and January, (when they have a demanding high school season in front of them), how fresh can I expect them to be in June? To quote a friend, ..... "I'm raising a daughter, not a softball player".

 

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quaker
has it ever come down to which team hit the most fair balls

 

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DADDYS A.D.D. is kicking in and I cant read all this but I would say unless your kid is going to a projected hall of famer in one of the two sports have her drop the other sport and have at it. But if she's like every other kid in the state who likes to play multiple sports and you incourage this in her to "keep her off the pole when she grows up" let her miss a few practices.

Also on a serious note DADDY is finding out that driving the kid to hard just because you want it more for them is no good!

 

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Also on a serious note DADDY is finding out that driving the kid to hard just because you want it more for them is no good!

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never thought I would say this, but I have to agree with Daddy on this one. My son plays baseball, right now my husband and son are not speaking because my husband wants my son to behave the way my husband thinks he should. Right now I am dealing with two teenage boys because the adult can't understand that the teenager has to want it for himself. All the nagging and using the guilt thing will NEVER work!!

 

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..."keep her off the pole when she grows up"...

lol!!

 

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" Also on a serious note DADDY is finding out that driving the kid to hard just because you want it more for them is no good! "

Daddy, this is wise! In fact, you are more likely to drive them to the pole by pushing TOO HARD. When they are little, you can push them "FORWARD", ... later on you push them "AWAY" ... if you are not careful. None of us want that, right? Don't lose "trust" at ANY cost, it's a lifetime relationship we are talking about, with bigger things that softball ahead.

We go hard most of the year, including Summer ball with an aggressive performance oriented schedule & mentality. Plus fall tournaments & competition, and winter Spano, work-outs, private instruction etc.

Now, at 14u, we have decided to let off the throttle a little, and trust our kids to work on their own if they cannot make off-season activities, which are still highly encouraged, and readily available. They need to have a life of their own, and WANT to come be with us, actually look forward to it. Now, in the summer, OTOH, we OWN THEM!!

We have GREAT kids & families though, that "buy in", and we try to "buy back" in their direction as well. They like having a good team, and being an important part of a T-E-A-M. How you set that "culture" and "set of expectations" is vital, IMHO.

Great question though, and one we all struggle with from time to time!