Hitter23? Guess that post got deleted before I read it.
Anyway, I have to strongly agree with those who say that some steps should be taken to stop the bleeding. And no, this isn't equivalent to telling your kids as a general matter not to give 110%. It's equivalent to telling your kids that IN SOME LIMITED SITUATIONS, giving 110% is inconsistent with the softball culture. Our girls are smart enough to understand if you tell them directly that this is one of the few situations where you don't want them going all out.
Phrased differently, there is an easy answer to 3dm's question ("but if you start teaching that you can lay back when you feel the game is in hand who's to say the girls don't get that mindset when it is not appropriate"
: the COACH is responsible for making sure that the girls understand the limited situations for laying back and the importance of giving 110% in other situations.
And I also think that our girls are smart enough to respect a coach who doesn't feel the need to totally embarrass a clearly inferior team.