It's that time of the year when everyone goes around to all of the tryouts. It really drives me CRAZY when you know you aren't going to choose a team anyway and you leave them HANGING. The coaches are people too. They all aren't dirty dogs. As well as returning players who want the commitment they already gave and intend to give again to the same organization. Some coaches really are trying to make good selections and pick just the right fit for their team. Some, on the other hand are looking for that one big stud with a great bat. WAKE UP PARENTS...... if you really don't want to be on a team when they offer you a spot. TURN IT DOWN or don't waste the teams time by going to their tryout. Especially if it is not that elite team you feel is not good enough for your darling daughter anyway. There are tons of other talented girls out there just dying to play travel ball with out such a ego of a parent thinking the grass is always greener on the winning side. To bad they have to wait around till someone decides if it is a winning enough fit for their child or not.
Leaving a team hanging.....
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wow
Active Member
Such a tough topic. Both sides have agendas. I agree, make a decision without haste. Be open minded and always talk time frame with coaches and ask when they need to know. I always tell my kids to treat these as an adult should treat a job interview. Be respectful and do your homework. If you go to a tryout know you want to play for that team. Don't waste the coaches or your own time if you don't intend on taking the offer. If you do try out and don't take it let the coaches know asap. You NEVER know when you might go back.
Coaches should always put a time limit on their offers and only give as much time that is in proportion with the gap for the next-best option. If there isn't much difference between the 2 players, they shouldn't risk getting neither by waiting on the first choice.
Coaches need to do some soulsearching before making offers. Is their team good enough to be a good fit for the better player and keep her for the whole year? Is the lesser player good enough to PLAY on their team? If not, they should they keep looking.
Coaches need to do some soulsearching before making offers. Is their team good enough to be a good fit for the better player and keep her for the whole year? Is the lesser player good enough to PLAY on their team? If not, they should they keep looking.
Irish196
Active Member
I wouldn't let my daughter go to a tryout if she flat out knew she would
never want to be on the team. That is disrespectful to everyone. However, I don't think going to a tryout
where they are not your absolute first choice but still would consider the opportunity
is to be expected. It's tough because this is really the only time of the year
players have any kind of a choice and that choice basically is extended for a day or two per
offer. After you make your choice you live with that all year no matter what happens; fair or not. It's a big
choice and going into the tryout season you never know what you will be offered. If you
did it would all be easy! You want to help your daughter make the best decision possible but that
is difficult when there are so many unknowns and many reasons to second guess yourself.
never want to be on the team. That is disrespectful to everyone. However, I don't think going to a tryout
where they are not your absolute first choice but still would consider the opportunity
is to be expected. It's tough because this is really the only time of the year
players have any kind of a choice and that choice basically is extended for a day or two per
offer. After you make your choice you live with that all year no matter what happens; fair or not. It's a big
choice and going into the tryout season you never know what you will be offered. If you
did it would all be easy! You want to help your daughter make the best decision possible but that
is difficult when there are so many unknowns and many reasons to second guess yourself.
maddball44
Member
My dd accepted an offer Saturday night. We went to a "big" organizations try out Sunday. We just wanted to see if she could compete. Try to gage what she needed to work on to be at that level. Lo and behold they offered her a spot. We declined, but I hope he doesn't think we wasted his time. It is something we will consider for next year but we had already made a commitment.
backstop09
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Definitely not cool.
maddball44
Member
I'm sorry, I don't understand why that is not "cool". We were strung along by the team she played for this year till the last second (cut). It goes both ways. They are looking for the best oppurtunity; so are we. And I truely thought there was no way they would offer her a position. This is only her second year of tb (14U). I just wanted to see what it takes to be at the top level. I always see on here to be honest about your kids talent. The only way to find that out is to tryout with them. Now I know.
Irish196
Active Member
I think the problem is that you are taking up time from the coaches and other girls who want to be on the team or don't have an offer. You say your daughter got an offer. That means that she definitely got a lot of the coaches' attention; attention which could have been focused on another girl in the running. Maybe a girl who was close just didn't make the "a" list because they put your daughter there. Now that girl decides to go with a different team because she didn't get a call back in time from this team, etc, etc. It's all good/fair if both girls were available and considering the team, but it is wrong, IMO, if your daughter had an offer and had no intention of trying out. Why not just watch the tryout without jeopardizing another girl's chances who wasn't lucky enough to have an offer? Kudos though for not reneging on the first offer. From what I have seen this year, it looks like there are people who would have no problem doing that.
backstop09
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What's not cool is participating in another team's tryout after you already committed to a team. If your goal is really to see how your kid stacks up against the kids that show up at the Sunday tryout, what would be wrong with just going and watching? As far as you hoping the Sunday coach doesn't feel like you were wasting his time, how else should he feel?
ApogeeDemon
In the Penalty Box
You are wasting peoples time. Coaches from different organizations talk. Imagine that Saturday team's coach calls and talks to his friend about his tryouts and girls. Then the next day she shows up at the other guys tryout. If you want to gage how good your daughter is, watch her play in tournaments. How does she do against teams like the Lasers, Outlaws etc. Putting her in a line to field balls surrounded by girls that you have no idea of their skill level will not help you evaluate your daughters skills. Just an opinion.
wow
Active Member
Have to think you go to a tryout you WANT to play on the team? Why just test the waters, feel like you would not get the offer, then when it comes say "no thanks". Hmmm has to more to the story...
maddball44
Member
Why is there always more to the story. We were going there before she committed. We were making a day of it. No one's time was wasted. The coach emailed me to let me know they filled the spot. I understand. It's all part of it. It's that time of year. Coaches certainly string players all the time. He knew immediately we weren't interested.
Guess I am somewhat perplexed at the criticism for maddball44. Do coaches put out complete information on what they are looking for at tryouts? What about those organizations that have multiple tryouts and some of the coaches only show up for one or two? After watching a player perform 1 or 2 parts of a tryout and knowing that are not going to offer them a spot should the coach tell them to go home. I know these scenarios may sound a little bit out there, because coaches nearly ALWAYS will tell you that if a real stud shows up, they will make room, so they want to see as much talent as possible. Yet, all these scenarios waste the time and energy of players and parents that really have no hope of making a team. Whatever tryouts maddball44 took her DD to had the opportunity to impress the player and parent enough to make them reconsider their decision. Kudos to them for sticking with their decision. Possibly a missed opportunity for a team.
Disclaimer: I have nobody involved in this and have no idea who maddball44 is. Retired, just expressing an opinion.
Disclaimer: I have nobody involved in this and have no idea who maddball44 is. Retired, just expressing an opinion.
coachjwb
Well-Known Member
It's not a huge deal, but I don't think it's kosher to go to a tryout if you are already committed to another team and there's no chance you are going to accept an offer even if you get one.
I may have misinterpreted what maddball was saying, but it kind of sounds like they just wanted to brag that the DD got an offer from this top tier organization and then turned it down? It's definitely good that they let the coach know right away after that they weren't interested, but in the meantime I kind of feel like they were playing head games with the coach. I mean it's a tryout ... the coaches are there to focus on who at the tryout is going to be the best fit for their team. They have to spread their time around between all of the players who are there. Someone else who really wanted to be on the team might have got less of a look as a result.
A couple of analogies ... the car in front of you at the drive through goes through the line, orders some food and then gets to the window to pay and says never mind I didn't really want anything. I have a good friend who works in Sales and 100% of their salary is commission ... each sales person on the floor takes turn getting "ups" and may have to wait a couple of hours till the next one ... occasionally someone comes in to the store on their up, acts like they're interested, and then says "oh, we were just killing some time before going to the movie next door ... we buy all of our furniture at your competitor anyhow". Thanks a bunch ...
I may have misinterpreted what maddball was saying, but it kind of sounds like they just wanted to brag that the DD got an offer from this top tier organization and then turned it down? It's definitely good that they let the coach know right away after that they weren't interested, but in the meantime I kind of feel like they were playing head games with the coach. I mean it's a tryout ... the coaches are there to focus on who at the tryout is going to be the best fit for their team. They have to spread their time around between all of the players who are there. Someone else who really wanted to be on the team might have got less of a look as a result.
A couple of analogies ... the car in front of you at the drive through goes through the line, orders some food and then gets to the window to pay and says never mind I didn't really want anything. I have a good friend who works in Sales and 100% of their salary is commission ... each sales person on the floor takes turn getting "ups" and may have to wait a couple of hours till the next one ... occasionally someone comes in to the store on their up, acts like they're interested, and then says "oh, we were just killing some time before going to the movie next door ... we buy all of our furniture at your competitor anyhow". Thanks a bunch ...
maddball44
Member
No, it's more like, we're just looking right now but when we are ready to buy we now know we can afford your store. We'll be back. Thanks for your time
coachjwb
Well-Known Member
Perhaps ... as long as the coach was cool with it, and you have no worries that they felt like you wasted their time this year ...
softballmom2000
Member
My DD got an offer early from a private tryout. I was happy to not have to go through the multiple tryouts on a weekend! It was also nice not to have DD under tons of pressure. I don't know that I would go to a tryout just for fun, mostly because I don't see them as fun.
dennis golic
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coaches want to see the player under tons of pressure. if you have multiple tryouts in that week no one is going to get an answer until your done. coaches now want you to sign before you leave the tryout so the cross town organization doesn't get a chance to sign you at their tryout.
joboo1drew
Member
Agree Dennis. This is the only time of year when parents have the control over the coaches. Some abuse it.
As a coach, I have absolutely no problem with a kid coming to my tryout if they are already planning on playing for another team. I had a girl this past weekend say right in the beginning that she was already committed to another team and could she still do the tryout. I said absolutely!!! We didn't keep an evaluation paper on her since we knew she was already committed but it didn't hurt anything to let her get a workout. She brought a friend with her who was actually trying out. You never know who they may bring and it didn't hurt me or my selection of players one bit. Tis the season.......don't take everything so personally. The girls want what's best for them and the coaches want what's best for the team, it's the nature of the beast.
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